Newsletter

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter, where I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

Who is your climbing buddy?

Leadership is like climbing a mountain with no top. And if you know, even the most professional mountain climbers do not climb alone. They often have a few people (their team) supporting them on the journey. Yet in leadership, there is still a myth that we have to do it alone.

On the mountain, your climbing buddy can tell you when you stray off track, can throw a rope when you slip up, or call for help when you are injured or unable to continue the journey.

In leadership, it is the same. Nobody is perfect, and leadership does not demand us to be. A good “leadership buddy” allows you to move forward into the unchartered waters that leaders often have to, knowing that someone has your back. Your leadership buddy can show you where you are better than yourself.

They can prevent you from wasting time and energy in crevasses of strongly held opinions, blame, frustration, stress, self-pity, and impostor syndrome. They can allow you to confidently move forward and remember who you really are – especially when you forget it yourself. And we all forget that at times.

Who is your climbing buddy? Who could be one? Who are the people who always have your back?

How can you create a team of buddies to empower and support your leadership – not because you are weak or imperfect – but because the future you have committed to is so much important?

What could be possible in your life if you stop trying to do it all alone? Who are those people you can invite to be your climbing buddies?

Do not rush to answer this question. Think about it. Journal about it. And see what comes up.

And then reply back and share what you discover. I read and respond to every reply.

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

Choose Carefully – Podcast

All of us make choices all the time, and we may think we’re making those choices freely. But psychologists know and say that there is an architecture behind the way choices are presented to us, and this invisible architecture can influence decisions both large and small.

Here is a podcast that illustrates how we make unconscious choices and how decision architecture can influence those choices.

An episode on the Hidden Brain podcast

Two

100 Days Of Joy

People incorrectly associate happiness with accomplishments and achievements. They can quickly serve as death sentences for delight and enthusiasm.

As adults, we lose sight of the things that bring us joy because we’re too focused on success. But things that bring joy don’t need to have a metric attached to them. They are worth doing simply because they make you happy. Nothing is a waste of time that gives you energy. 

In The Untethered Soul, Michael A. Singer explains that people have a phenomenal amount of energy inside of them:

“It doesn’t come from food and it doesn’t come from sleep. This energy is always available to you. At any moment you can draw upon it. It just wells up and fills you from inside. When you’re filled with this energy, you feel like you could take on the world.”

When we prioritize joy we draw upon the energy that fills us from the insides and emanates out to everyone and everything we come in contact with. And if we don’t prioritize joy, we fall into a repetitious trap of shoulds and expectations and worry. 

From an article titled 100 Days of Joy

Three

Are you Interested? or Are you Committed?

When one says he is committed to something, does it mean a trade? Does it mean that I will do this or that only if you do some other this or that? Does this commitment expect something in return from the other side? Will the commitment waver if one doesn’t get a response from the other side?

In my experiences over the years, I have realized that our aim should not, and cannot, be to make our commitment contingent on some external factor. If our commitment wavers because of a lack of response from the other side, then maybe that was not even committed in the first place.

That is the difference between interest and commitment. If I am interested in some results, I will take steps to get that result. But it will be very easy to give up (in the case of interest) when circumstances turn averse or not as expected. We no longer see the interest getting fulfilled, so we have every reason to back out. Fair enough.

But a commitment is bigger, it is a promise you make to yourself (more than anybody else) and then there are no excuses, but only results that matter. For example, a mother has a commitment to her child, and she will even go hungry to feed her child. A mother doesn’t demand fairness from her son, she just loves her, for that is her commitment.

Where have you been holding back your commitment?

From an article from my desk – The difference between being interested vs being committed.

Four

What is boredom? And what does it have to do with desire and meaning?

Contrary to popular belief, boredom doesn’t have much to do with being idle. Instead, it has more to do with desire, and the inability to direct that desire toward anything meaningful.

Idleness doesn’t lead to boredom as long as that idleness is desired. Sitting alone and doing nothing may look really boring to an outsider, but for the person that finds meaning in that activity, it is not.

This is why escaping boredom through binge-watching Netflix or scrolling through Twitter feels empty afterwards. Your engagement in those activities wasn’t grounded in intention, but rather from a mindless whim to satisfy a sense of longing.

Desire’s greatest trick is in convincing us that we will be satisfied after we fulfil it. We realize that the “promised land” is actually just a starting point for another journey.

Funnily enough, the antidote to boredom is to actively seek it at various moments in your life. By giving yourself the space to do nothing, you cease looking outward for novel experiences and look inward to uncover the meaning that can be found within the nuances of your mind.

From an article on More than That – The Riddle of Boredom

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Dear reader, click here to view this leadership update on your browser.

“So many people appear confident, but there’s always something going on.” – Nina Rauch

Nina Rauch founded the social initiative Pink Week for breast cancer awareness in 2013 at only the age of 16. Her campaign has since raised over $500,000 (including $48,000 in under an hour). As a result of that, she was named a Future 100 by Barclays. She is currently leading Social Impact, CSR and Giveback for Lemonade; which is an insurance company driven by social good.

In the interview, Nina shares how losing her mother inspired her to start Pink Week. She opens up and talks about how bad things hurt her heart, and how knowing that has shaped her career. She also talks about the importance of working in a company where you feel comfortable expressing your voice, which I think is one of the main tasks of any leader in any organisation.

She adds, “If you have a job that you’re passionate about and that you’re focused on, it really helps to calm the nerves and decrease some of that intense pressure because you’re going in the right direction.. “

Find the full audio interview and show notes here

“It is important to put yourself into the shoes of those that you want to inspire” – Christian Guttmann

Christian Guttman is a leader in science, technology and business; because of which he was named a Top 100 AI global leader recently. He has been a startup founder, professor, Vice President and Executive Director at some of the largest international tech companies, successful startups and leading universities.

In the interview, Christian and I spoke about our common love for technology and leadership, about computers and people, and about artificial and human intelligence. We talk about the importance of listening with empathy, understanding the cultural assumptions that lie behind all conversations, and the important role of curiosity when it comes to leadership.

He adds that as a leader, “it is important to have empathy, to put yourself into the shoes of those that you want to inspire, that you want to help and want to lead and want to manage and want to give a perspective. “

Find the full audio interview and show notes here

Related Finds

The Benefits of Silence

How Not To Be Wrong – Book Summary

How To Run Effective And Quick Meetings?

How to Answer People’s Questions

Thinking in Systems – Book Summary

5 Steps To Deploy Yourself And Live An Authentic Life

How can you contribute?

Choosing Leadership is a podcast for people who know deep inside that there is more. My invitation to you is to “choose” leadership and to step up as a leader.

Subscribe to the Choosing Leadership podcast on Spotify, Google, or Amazon Music. We are also live on Apple Itunes.

I am interviewing leaders to learn from their stories – of how they came to be where they are today. These are the stories peers and friends don’t usually know, and my attempt is to bring them out. Find out what has shaped them to be the person and leader they are today.

Our journeys might not look alike. They might resemble more of a roller-coaster ride than a race track, and that is what makes each one of us special and unique in our own ways. I am deeply touched when someone takes the time to share their story with me.

If you would like to recommend someone else who I should interview, feel free to recommend them. You can send me a message on LinkedIn or send me an email at sumit@deployyourself.com.

Until the next week, keep Choosing Leadership.

With gratitude,

Sumit

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter, where I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

Who are you?

This is a simple question that can be scary and liberating at the same time. I have written a lot about powerful questions – and about the value of asking better questions.

One such question to ask ourselves is, “Who am I?”

If you let this question marinate and reflect over it, you will see answers emerge at 3 levels of depth.

1. At the surface level, the obvious answer is your name. Like – “I am Sumit Gupta”. Isn’t that obvious? But – is that really you – your name? Isn’t it more accurate to say, “My parents named me Sumit, but I am much more that those 5 letters.”
2. If you go just a bit deeper into the inquiry with this question, you will start coming up with the roles you play. Like for me – I am a son, father, husband, photographer, coach, leader, and so on. Or – the boxes you have found yourself in – either by choice or by default. Like – I am Hindu, Indian, Dutch, liberal, man, and so on. But again, ask yourself – Is that who you are? Or – is there more to you than the roles you play?
3. The third level is the level where you Deploy Yourself and choose who you want to BE. This is where your creative choice comes alive and you show up as a leader you are required to BE, rather than who you think you are. It means choosing in any given moment who you want to BE – to create results that matter to you. For example –
   1. When you are with your child, you can BE funny and playful (even if you have been having a bad day)
   2. When you are with your team, you can BE empathetic and caring (to create powerful teams and relationships)
   3. When you are reviewing work commitments, you can BE straight, focussed, and hold people accountable (to produce results)
   4. When you mess up or make a mistake, you can BE apologetic to clear the mess you have created.
   5. And when you have to take risks as a leader, you can BE bold and brave (to move forward towards the future).

What is opening up for you with the above exploration?

Instead of operating from who you think you are – nice, kind, bold, shy, caring, etc – you can choose to BE who you need to be as a leader – in any given moment. That is when you Deploy Yourself and produce results previously thought impossible.

What could be possible in your life if you can creatively choose who you are? What could be beyond your name, your roles, your beliefs, and your past experiences?

Do not rush to answer this question. Think about it. Journal about it. And see what comes up. What new possibilities open up? What questions and doubts come up?

And then reply back and share what you discover. I read and respond to every reply.

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

Pursue Mastery, Not Status

Measurements give us the valuable information required to track progress, but unfortunately, they also standardize that progress into a universal, almost soulless metric.

Each domain wields its standard metric of progress, and by focusing on it intently, we gauge our work not by what we produce, but by how it is received and measured. Anytime progress is standardized, a status game is reinforced. 

It often leads to a never-ending game of comparison via shallow standards. Our relentless chase for status (and the showboating of it) is a cancer that masquerades as success. 

Fortunately, there is an antidote to this cancer, and its name is mastery.

Mastery is the quest to improve yourself as an end in itself. Comparisons are not made with other people, but only with prior versions of yourself. 

Status is obtained by collecting attention, whereas mastery is achieved by refining intuition. Status is always relational, so external validation is a prerequisite to feeling secure. Mastery, on the other hand, is gauged by your unique sense of progress, which can only be derived from within.

The key here is to continue seeing status for the societal poison that it is, and to resist its allure.

Do away with status. Choose mastery instead.

And an article by Lawrence Yeo on More Than That

Two

Storytelling matters more than you think it does

A truth that applies to many fields, which can frustrate some as much as it energizes others, is that the person who tells the most compelling story wins. Not who has the best idea, or the right answer. Just whoever tells a story that catches people’s attention and gets them to nod their heads.

Charles Darwin didn’t discover evolution, he just wrote the first and most compelling book about it.

Great ideas explained poorly can go nowhere while old or wrong ideas told compellingly can ignite a revolution.

When a topic is complex, stories are like leverage.

Stories get diverse people to focus attention on a single point.

Good stories create so much hidden opportunity among things you assume can’t be improved.

From an article titled The Best Story Wins.

Three

6 Things You Must Not Do As a Leader To Ensure High Team Performance

It is easier to cause damage as a leader by ignorance than it is to improve performance by deliberate intervention. Here are 6 things that you must avoid doing :

1. Do not accept mediocrity or low standards. Whatever standards you accept will become the norm. 

2. Don’t treat people with disrespect. Even when they mess up. 

3. Don’t force people to commit to deadlines or take on work that would mean spending time away from their families or ignoring their health.

4. Don’t put profits over employee well-being. Don’t push people to stress and burnout

5. Don’t bias your decisions because of who and what you like. 

6. Don’t micromanage. Trust people and let them do the work they were hired for.

From an article from my desk – 6 Things You Must Not Do As a Leader To Ensure High Team Performance

Four

Before you say “I can not do this”, view this Twitter thread

Hansel lost his arm at the age of 6. A wall collapsed on it, requiring amputation. Now he’s a high school basketball star with his eyes on the NBA.

When asked how he wants others to see him, Hansel said:

“Not as a kid who has a disability. I hope they only see me as a great player.”

Do not miss this on Twitter

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Dear reader, click here to view this leadership update on your browser.

“You do not have to be the cleverest person in the room” – Jason Rees

Jason Rees is a customer-focused technology solutions leader with over 25 years of experience in architecting, delivering, supporting and leading technology projects for clients and customers. He is currently a VP at Oracle Corporation.

In the interview, Jason shares how playing and coaching team sports like Rugby has shaped his leadership. He talks about how as a leader, you do not have to be the most clever person in the room with all the answers, and how he sees listening to different perspectives as a superpower. He told me his leadership is not about him, but about his teams. And I found that very powerful.

He adds, “everyone wants to feel relevant. Everyone wants to feel, they understand why a big company or a small company quite frankly, is going in the direction is doing going. “

Find the full audio interview and show notes here

“I’ve had to work on reining in my natural instinct to avoid burning out!” – Kindred Motes

Kindred Motes is the founder and managing director at KMSG, which is a boutique strategy, social impact, management, and communications consulting firm. KMSG leadership brings more than a decade of communications, social impact, philanthropic, management, and digital strategy experience to its practice, including impact campaigns for or in collaboration with some of the most prominent names in the social justice, technology, policy, and philanthropic sectors: 

The United Nations, The Obama White House, USAID, ACLU, Global Citizen, Netflix, Participant Media, Amnesty International, Oxfam, Google, the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation, Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC), Vera Institute of Justice, the Foundation for Louisiana, Wallace Global Fund, and New America, among others. 

He talks about how he had to work on reining in his natural instinct, which is to get excited and say yes to a project just because the organization’s mission or vision aligns with his without first considering his own likelihood of burning out from continual 16 hour days. 

This year, KMSG is implementing a 4-day workweek and requiring any current or future staff or contractors to make time for their own rest, relaxation, and creativity by asking them to take a minimum of four weeks per year in paid time off.

Which in my opinion, is commendable.

Read the full written interview with Kindred

Related Finds

The ONE Thing by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan – Book Summary & Review

Difficult Conversations (1999) by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton and Sheila Heen – Book Notes

8 Leadership Traits, Skills & Qualities for Effective Leaders

7 Essential Work Skills For The Future – The 2020s And 2030s

8 Reasons We Should Know Our Values, Worth, and Purpose

How can you contribute?

Choosing Leadership is a podcast for people who know deep inside that there is more. My invitation to you is to “choose” leadership and to step up as a leader.

Subscribe to the Choosing Leadership podcast on Spotify, Google, or Amazon Music. We are also live on Apple Itunes.

I am interviewing leaders to learn from their stories – of how they came to be where they are today. These are the stories peers and friends don’t usually know, and my attempt is to bring them out. Find out what has shaped them to be the person and leader they are today.

Our journeys might not look alike. They might resemble more of a roller-coaster ride than a race track, and that is what makes each one of us special and unique in our own ways. I am deeply touched when someone takes the time to share their story with me.

If you would like to recommend someone else who I should interview, feel free to recommend them. You can send me a message on LinkedIn or send me an email at sumit@deployyourself.com.

Until the next week, keep Choosing Leadership.

With gratitude,

Sumit

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter, where I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

How to do a 3 level awareness check-in for optimal performance and wellbeing?

We casually ask each other “how are you doing” and then casually answer “fine” and “good” all the time. What a missed opportunity to increase both well-being and performance!

A few of my clients who are senior executives in organisations have started to implement a 3-level awareness check-in which has shown tremendous results. Here is what they have been doing in their 1on1 and group meetings.

Before the meeting starts, each person checks in by answering “how am I doing?” on three different levels –

• What am i thinking (rationally) right now? It could be a worry, a new idea, a nagging thought, or anything else on their mind.
• What am i feeling (emotionally) right now? It could be sadness, peace, anxiety, joy, stress, ambition, or any other emotion.
• What am I sensing (physically) right now? It could be a faster heart rate, stiffness in neck, back pain, butterflies in the stomach, goosebumps, excitement, or any other body sensation.

We all know self-awareness is important, but do we know what does self-awareness even mean? To be self-aware means to be aware of the 3 levels of awareness – thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations.

Teams who have been using the “3 level awareness check-in” have reported deeper relationships, a reduction in stress, and an increase in wellbeing and productivity at the same time. Try it out for yourself – at work or even at home – with family.

Does your team follow a similar or a different way to check-in before a meeting? Have you tried the 3-level awareness check-in? Have you created enough psychological safety in your team for people to share what they are thinking, feeling, and sensing?

Reply back and share what you discover. If you have any questions, just hit reply. I read and respond to every reply.

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

How to build remote teams properly

Winning at the remote game means building your company in a way that empowers the employees, establishes self-sufficient teams that function autonomously with little supervision. Here are a few tips :

Start with implementing proper onboarding processes. This means having a standard procedure for introducing a person to the whole company and to the team where he will be working.

Have an employee handbook – all the stuff that the person might need to know – your principles, work ethic, etc. EVERYTHING needs to be in there.

Keep it personal, or at least make sure that the system is in place to make the person feel welcomed. Engage with him, guide him through his first few days.

The first thing to do is to set up a system for asynchronous and synchronous communication.

Automate and integrate everything, join your different services (HubSpot, Jira, HR Software, Monitoring Software …) into one big hub.

Keep everything transparent – the feedback, the decisions, the mistakes, the praise.

Keep track of the mental health of your employees. The line between work and life gets blurred when you’re working from home. Make sure your employees know that it’s OK to turn off notifications. It’s OK not to respond immediately.

Create timed entries in your calendar – blocks of 2-, 4-, or 6- hours where you only do the task. No emails, no meetings, no nothing. Just the task at hand – it keeps you focused, and you don’t waste time.

And more suggestions from Vadim Kravcenko in the article How to build remote teams properly

Two

I Got Promoted To Management. Three Reasons Why That Was A Bad Idea

Promoting people based on their success in their previous role fails because of three main reasons.

1. Management is a different role altogether, not an extension of your current “individual contributor” role. Yet, most people are promoted or rewarded with a “management role” for succeeding in their previous role.
2. New managers usually have no idea what it means to be a manager and only have bad examples to follow from their own untrained managers.
3. Managers (new and old) never learn the skills required for their new role before getting promoted. Nobody shows them how to develop a leadership style that is authentic as well as results-driven. 

What Should Happen Instead?

1. Dangling the managerial role as a carrot result in skewed incentives. Management roles should not be handed out as a reward for good performance.
2. Companies should invest in their managers by providing them with the right tools, resources, and support they need to hone their management skills and refine their strengths. 
3. People who want to move into management and show strength in relevant skills should get management positions. These skills are motivating people, clear communication, overcoming challenges and obstacles, fostering accountability, building strong relationships, and good decision making.

They will end up not only creating better business results, but also a growth-oriented culture and strong relationships on the way.

From an article from my desk – I Got Promoted To Management. Three Reasons Why That Was A Bad Idea

Three

Making Self-Care Tactical – and boundaries

Sometimes self-care might look like taking a bath. And sometimes self-care might look like speaking up, erecting boundaries, being assertive and holding yourself accountable.

Everyone has access to self-care. It’s not just about what you spend your money on, it’s also about how you invest your time, your effort and your energy into meaningful work. Setting up boundaries is self-care work. Full stop. Boundaries allow us to recognize what we do and don’t have control over.

Consistently saying, “Yes” when we should be saying, “No” not only impacts us by causing stress and burnout — it also enables the destructive behaviors that keep people coming back to us. Remind yourself that saying yes to something is saying no to something else.

People often think mindfulness means taking a deep breath, meditating, and then moving on. Mindfulness is learning to be rooted in the present by engaging in a specific task.

From an article on FirstRound – Making Self-Care Tactical

Four

Podcast – How to Multiply Your Impact

The #1 thing managers appreciate: when employees do things that need doing without being asked.

Upward empathy is the ability to consider what the bosses situation feels like — and what they need from you.

A job description might be a starting point, but it’s almost never the ending point.

Beware of becoming the foosball player that does hard work in one spot, but misses the bigger picture. Become a nimble midfielder who plays where they are most needed.

From an interview of Liz Wiseman on a podcast episode titled – How to Multiply Your Impact

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Dear reader, click here to view this leadership update on your browser.

“We can’t be of service to the world without truly knowing ourselves” – Yarrow Kraner

Yarrow Kraner is the Founder of HATCH and H360.ai, is an Aspen Institute Fellow, RSA Fellow, a member of Catalyst 2030, and named 2015 top 100 creatives in the U.S. by Origins. He’s directed projects with Richard Branson, The Rock, P Diddy, and more.

In the podcast episode, Yarrow opened up about his childhood and shares how he was bullied at school where he was the only white boy. He speaks about how this experience allowed him to build empathy later on and understand his own privilege as a white man. He shared how this led him to start an organisation looking to find the superhero in every person, and how it continues to shape his leadership.

Find the full audio interview and show notes here

“Success to me is being the person you want to be and, to look in the mirror and just be good with it.” – Bojana Duovski

Bojana Duovski is a serial entrepreneur and co-founder of YourNextStory, Concierge Amsterdam, and Dutch Uncle, and she is gifted to recognise and acknowledge talent and connect worlds that are too far apart.

What stood out during my interview with Bojana was how she dedicates time for her “Walk and talk”, which is, in her own words, “a gift of her presence that she voluntarily gives others”. She has done over 400 of these in the last few years, where she would walk and talk in the woods or in a park in Amsterdam with the other person.

Find the full audio interview and show notes here

Related Finds

Why we should break the safety walls around us?

The 5 Levels of Leadership from John Maxwell

The power of walking in another person’s shoes

The Promise of a Pencil – review and summary of Adam Braun’s wonderful book

Notes from one of the best books about taking care of employees – Everybody Matters

How can you contribute?

Choosing Leadership is a podcast for people who know deep inside that there is more. My invitation to you is to “choose” leadership and to step up as a leader.

Subscribe to the Choosing Leadership podcast on Spotify, Google, or Amazon Music. We are also live on Apple Itunes.

I am interviewing leaders to learn from their stories – of how they came to be where they are today. These are the stories peers and friends don’t usually know, and my attempt is to bring them out. Find out what has shaped them to be the person and leader they are today.

Our journeys might not look alike. They might resemble more of a roller-coaster ride than a race track, and that is what makes each one of us special and unique in our own ways. I am deeply touched when someone takes the time to share their story with me.

If you would like to recommend someone else who I should interview, feel free to recommend them. You can send me a message on LinkedIn or send me an email at sumit@deployyourself.com.

Until the next week, keep Choosing Leadership.

With gratitude,

Sumit

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter, where I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

Create (or change) your definition of “hard work” and “success”

What is your definition of “hard work”? Does it just mean doing more of what you have been doing? Does it just mean slogging and working more hours and “trying” harder?

What is your definition of “success”? Does it just mean accumulating more money, titles, and possessions? Does it just mean chasing milestone after milestone, even when you feel empty on the inside and have no idea what you are running after?

I have found that most people have an inherited definition of “hard work” and “success” – from their parents, peers, and mentors. They have rarely taken time to define what hard work means to them, and what all does it include or exclude. Read the below statement as you make your own definition of hard work.

• Does your definition of hard work include REFLECTION, REST, and HARD THINKING instead of just doing more?
• Does your definition of success include being VULNERABLE and HONEST rather than projecting fake confidence?
• Does your definition of hard work include SLOWING DOWN to see what others can’t see?
• Does your definition of success include CREATING THE FUTURE instead of living into a future handed down to you by your manager, education, or experiences?
• Does your definition of hard work allow you to see your own limitations (SELF-AWARENESS)?
• Does your definition of success include taking RESPONSIBILITY without blame when you mess up?
• Does your definition of hard work include living in UNANSWERED QUESTIONS, instead of having the right answers?

The above is very simple when you understand it fully, but not easy. How do you want to define hard work and success? What all can it change in your life?

Reply back to share what you think. I read and respond to every reply.

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

Tone of voice when it comes to writing

This is Monzo’s tone of voice guide, which is a (fairly) brief overview of how they write. Some important points from the guide are :

1. Every word matters. Every word is a chance for us to make a connection with someone, go beyond what they’d expect from a bank and brighten their day.
2. Swap formal words for normal ones. Example – Use help instead of assistance, and start instead of commence.
3. Use more verbs and fewer nouns
4. Put yourself in your reader’s shoes when you’re writing; what are they going to be most interested in?
5. Always be clear about who’s doing what
6. Shorter sentences are easier for people to scan and quickly get the information they need. Plus, they’re more accessible for people who struggle with reading or have a cognitive disability, like dyslexia.
7. Use emojis to add context, not replace words

From the Tone of Voice guide by Monzo

Two

The Role of Language in Shaping Our World

Researchers at Stanford University have proved that the way we use language shape how we see the world.

It is often said that what you say is what you get. Saying that you are tired will actually make you feel tired and you will have all the symptoms to prove that. But we don’t realize that it was our word that caused it in the first place.

So the next time you speak, be aware of the words that come out of your mouth. Be aware of how others’ negative words make you speak out negative words too, and vice versa. Try to catch yourself when in negative emotion and speak powerful words instead.

Make your words work for you, not make it difficult for you to work. How? See examples below:-

1. Declare a Commitment. 
   1. I commit to exercising 30 minutes daily.
   2. Let us commit together to make this company the best place to work for.
2. Make a Promise
   1. I promise to finish this report in two days.
   2. I promise to never drink and drive again.
3. Make a Specific Request
   1. Can you finish this report before Friday or not?
   2. If you like it, can you share this article on Facebook today?
4. Offer Support
   1. Is there anything I can do to help you with this task?
   2. I am just a phone call away if you need me.
5. Offer Hope
   1. You will make it through it. You are stronger than you think.
   2. Believe in yourself, not the critics. I know you will prove them wrong.

From an article from my desk – Don’t Allow Yourself to Use the Word TIRED

Three

The power of making personal preferences and working styles explicit

When working with a new team, everyone experiences a steep learning curve—not just in terms of the work itself, but in how the team operates.

How do people prefer to communicate? What are their goals? What does collaboration look like? Usually, you learn the particulars and quirks of each individual over time, through trial and error.

Being proactive about sharing personal working styles is especially important in a remote era, given that virtual communication limits our ability to read tone or body language, while the lack of informal interactions or 1:1 time slows down the development of personal relationships.

For leaders, your User Manual can give the team insight into your leadership style, while your team’s manuals can help you better guide group dynamics and coach individuals in the manner that’s most helpful to them.

From an article on NOBL Academy – How User Manuals Foster Team Development

Four

Quality of Life, Science, and Religion

Social scientists are researching what humans can do to improve their quality of life. Their findings echo what religious practices perfected centuries ago.

Certain religious practices, even when removed from a spiritual context, are able to influence people’s minds in the measurable ways psychologists often seek.

For example, having people practice Buddhist meditation for a short time makes them kinder. And when we studied the act of giving thanks (gratitude), even in a secular context, we found it made people more virtuous.

We see synchrony in almost every religion the world over: Buddhists and Hindus often chant together in prayer; Christians and Muslims regularly kneel and stand in unison during worship; Jews often sway, or shuckle, when reciting prayers together. These actions belie a deep purpose: creating connection.

Regularly taking part in religious practices lessens anxiety and depression, increases physical health, and even reduces the risk of early death. The ways these practices leverage mechanisms of our bodies and minds can enhance the joys and reduce the pains of life.

Like any good scientist, I’m simply following the data without prejudice. And it’s humbling. Doing this doesn’t require accepting a given theology—just an open mind and an attitude of respect.

From an article on WIRED – Psychologists Are Learning What Religion Has Known for Years

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Dear reader, click here to view this e-mail on your browser.

Stuart Williams on the Choosing Leadership Podcast

This week I interviewed Stuart Williams, the creator of Impact Economics on the “Choosing Leadership with Sumit Gupta” podcast which I launched just at the end of 2021. This is what he has to say about colouring outside the lines:

“Ever since I was a young child, my mother taught me to color outside the lines, do not cover inside the lines, because then you’re part of the establishment color, outside the lines, be brave, they’ll create something, you know, literally, you know, create the future. You’d like to see. And, and so. I I’ve never had to think outside the box because I was never put in a box in the first place.”

Stuart Williams

This is a podcast for people who know deep inside that there is more. My invitation to you is to “choose” leadership and to step up as a leader in an area of life that matters to you – be it work, passion, health, impact in society, or something else. To listen to previous episodes, click here.

Subscribe to the Choosing Leadership podcast on Spotify, Google, or Amazon Music. (coming soon on Apple podcasts as well)

I am interviewing leaders to learn from their stories – of how they came to be where they are today. These are the stories peers and friends don’t usually know, and my attempt is to bring them out. Find out what has shaped them to be the person and leader they are today.

The Neuroscience behind emotions

Emotional intelligence has been a hot topic for many years now.

Why?

Because nobody taught us in school or college. Yet, learning how to navigate emotions is essential for both producing results and our wellbeing.

Various studies show that strong leaders have very strong Emotional Intelligence, in addition to their critical thinking skills.

If you’re interested in finding out the neuroscience behind emotions, check out this guide:

Learn the Neuroscience behind Emotions, and 5 Steps to Deal with Them Effectively

How can you contribute?

Our journeys might not look alike. They might resemble more of a roller-coaster ride than a race track, and that is what makes each one of us special and unique in our own ways. I am deeply touched when someone takes the time to share their story with me.

If you would like to recommend someone else who I should interview, feel free to recommend them. You can send me a message on LinkedIn or send me an email at sumit@deployyourself.com.

I wish you all a happy and prosperous 2022. Until the next week, keep Choosing Leadership.

With gratitude,

Sumit

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter, where I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

Do not wait for motivation and confidence.

Action produces momentum. Not the other way round. Once you start moving and take action, it produces momentum. As simple as that.

The same is true for motivation and confidence. They are a result of taking action, not a pre-requisite. Yet, so many of us wait for motivation and confidence before starting.

Take my personal example. I stopped myself from coaching full-time because I used to say I am not confident. Guess what, after more than 200 hours of coaching in 2021, my confidence levels have gone up massively. Why was I thinking I would be confident before?

Motivation and confidence often come from starting, not before. Are you waiting for motivation, confidence, or any other form of readiness to go after your dream project?

Let me be honest with you. “Ready” will never come. You do not need readiness or confidence to start. They are an outcome of taking action and moving forward, not a pre-requisite.

As Matthew McConaughey writes in his autobiography Greenlights, which is one of my favourite biographies, “If you have jumped into the arena, you are already a winner.”

What has the above sparked for you? If you are thinking it can’t be that easy, remember I never said it would be.

The above is very simple when you understand it fully, but not easy. How is this landing for you?

Reply back to share what you think. I read and respond to every reply.

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

The power of “Enough” – one word we don’t use much often

I don’t think growth is universally bad. In fact, I think it can be downright healthy. But it shouldn’t be left unchecked, and also shouldn’t be the default operating system setting.

We’ve delineated money as a Means vs money as a Meaning. Money has this sneaky way of transforming itself from a currency to a status symbol. If we let money or wealth define who we are, we’ll never come close to Enough, because someone is always going to have just a little bit more. To paraphrase Francis Bacon (or PT Barnum, depending on your source): Money is a terrific tool, yet a terrible tyrant.

From an article by Calibrating Capital titled Enough

Two

You’re Already More Persuasive than You Think

Vanessa Bohns writes in this HBR article about the opportunities we miss because we doubt our own power of persuasion. She says “we persistently underestimate our influence. “

Because most companies emphasize the rigidity and formality of their hierarchies, employees tend to assume that their influence is dependent upon their roles or titles — that if they lack official clout, they can’t ask for anything.

A major part of the problem is that employees tend to forget that managers are people too and that the dynamics affecting all relationships exist even in a boss-subordinate relationship. Bosses care about whether employees respect them, and they feel guilty and embarrassed if they let their direct reports down. It’s often harder for people, even bosses, to say “no” than “yes.”

When we ask for something, we tend to focus too intently on our own feelings — of embarrassment, weakness, or shame — and don’t give enough rational thought to how others perceive us. We assume that persuading people will provoke enmity.

What this all adds up to is untapped potential: to influence others, to effect change, to blow the whistle on wrongdoing. We don’t venture to transcend our formal roles. We fail to benefit from others’ cooperation. Some practical suggestions on how to make requests – Just ask, be direct, go back and ask again, and you do not need to offer an incentive.

From an article on Harvard Business Review – You’re Already More Persuasive than You Think

Three

Why True Joy and Real Happiness Doesn’t Come from Winning But From A Dignified Struggle?

We grow up believing that winning is what we should aim for, and that is what will give us true joy and happiness.

Even for those who “win” the big games of life, happiness often remains elusive. I have seen people win big in sports, careers, or friends and yet end up feeling empty, meaningless, and drained.

Have you ever felt something similar? Like you feel nothing after you get what you have been working towards all this while.

Over the years, I have realized that it is never just winning that makes us happy. It is always overcoming obstacles while going through a period of struggle or discomfort which leaves us feeling joyful and satisfied. Research has also shown that we are at our most blissful state when we are up against a difficult challenge.

When we push our boundaries and focus completely on learning from setbacks encountered, we get into a state of “flow“. In other words, we enjoy the most when we lose track of time while working on a hard challenge.

The best outcome of success when you go through a dignified struggle is never what you get out of it. The best outcome of going through such a challenge is what you become out of it. The medal, the bonus, and the adrenaline rush at the podium often go away in a fleeting moment. But your enhanced skills, abilities, and confidence will stay with you for the rest of your lives. 

Your big game is out there waiting for you. You just need to embrace the challenge.

From an article from my desk – Why True Joy and Real Happiness Doesn’t Come from Winning But From A Dignified Struggle?

Four

Lessons from 10 years of remote working

Increase communication volume

To increase communication, especially if the message is vital, use the three-way handshake. Tell your message to someone using whatever medium you’re using. Then, have that person tell you your message back (in their own words, of course, no copy and paste). You then repeat that message back to them. Assuming everyone has it right, you’ve just completed a three-way handshake.

Fix technical problems

Don’t wait until the start of the meeting that you’re hosting to find out your software/hardware/network / whatever is failing you. Don’t email documents around, use the cloud, OneDrive and shared documents. Edit stuff together.

Develop good habits

First, establish a work area. Work relatively set times. Be flexible, just don’t be unpredictable. Take breaks and make them real breaks. Move away from your workspace. Eat right and exercise. 

Be kind

Be flexible, understanding, and kind to one another. It takes real effort, but it’s worth it.

From an article on the Redgate Blog by Grant Fritchey

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Dear reader,

Launching the Choosing Leadership Podcast

For the last few months, I have been interviewing leaders and sharing their leadership journeys in a mini-newsletter in the gap week between two regular newsletters. You can also read this mini-issue online.

As of last week, I have also launched a podcast titled “Choosing Leadership with Sumit Gupta” and released 3 interviews. This is a podcast for people who know deep inside that there is more. My invitation to you is to “choose” leadership and to step up as a leader in an area of life that matters to you – be it work, passion, health, impact in society, or something else.

I will be starting (and stopping) multiple series of episodes from time to time. All of them will focus on leadership – but they will look at it from multiple angles and perspectives. I will lovingly and gently provoke you to help you see your own light – to help you see what you are already capable of.

To not miss future episodes, subscribe to the Choosing Leadership podcast on Spotify, Google, or Amazon Music. (coming soon on Apple podcasts as well)

Leadership Journeys

We all have a lot to learn from the stories of our leaders – of how they came to be where they are today. These are stories peers and friends don’t usually know, and my attempt is to give you an opportunity to learn from those who have already tasted success and made an impact.

Find out about the events from their lives that shaped them to be the person and leader they are. In the interview, they also share about the people who have influenced them the most in their leadership.

The First Episodes

Vicky Kennedy – “I learned to be my own advocate and take risks”

Vicky is the Chief Strategy Officer for Intellum, and, in her own words, has been nerdy about education for many years. She started in higher education but later pivoted to working in companies like Facebook and Amazon. She began to see how education can dramatically improve a company’s performance – from internal productivity to customer retention. In 2021 she developed a proprietary tool to unite all educational initiatives in one central map that demonstrates the education’s expected business impact.

Vicky shares how it was rattling for her to be laid off from a job where she had worked for 10 years. What surprised me was that, on top of that, she decided to switch her industry and city when that happened. She packed her bags and move from Florida to New York City to find work in a totally new industry. In the episode, she shares what gave her the courage to make such a massive shift.

Listen to the full interview with Vicky here

Kate Daniels – “I want to live in a world where all companies are B corporations”

Kate Daniels works to merge the worlds of economic growth and human development. She works directly with entities like the World Bank, the European Development Financing Institutions (DFIs), and startups. She leads projects for African and Latin American companies, International Development Organizations and the American Government through USAID. She has studied in 4 continents and brings a global perspective when leading teams and aligning businesses in emerging economies with international investment standards.

Kate opens up about growing up in a very isolated town with a population of only 432, and how that created a hunger to go out and experience the world. She talks about studying in Italy and later Ireland and then working in South Africa and Dubai on international aid programs. She talks about how leaving her country taught her the value of empathy and seeing the different ways people do things in different places.

Listen to the full interview with Kate here

Ramon Llamas – “It is not a zero-sum game”

Ramon Llamas focuses on building ecosystems to address health disparities, which are designed with equity and health as a fundamental starting point. His mission is to change how society views health. He thinks we cannot continue to depend on the providers of health care to fix our problems. He envisions a future where health care is a collaboration to maintain, rather than repair, an individual’s health and wellness.

Ramon shares his journey of coming from an immigrant family, and how losing his grandfather to cancer allowed him to experience and later shape the role of healthcare in society. Today he empowers individuals to take ownership and be more proactive when it comes to health. Treating everybody with dignity is one of his core values, and he is giving dignity back by focusing on public health in underserved populations.

Listen to the full interview with Ramon here

The most-popular Deploy Yourself articles of 2021

7 Empathetic Questions To Ask At Work to Understand And Support Your Colleagues

5 Valuable Life Lessons Struggle and Hardship Teaches You

The Culture Map by Erin Meyer – The Eight Scales Of Culture

Know What Great Managers Do? A List of 8 Expectations From Managers That Employees Have

How our Listening Filters Create our Reality and Limit Us

Creativity, Inc. By Ed Catmull – 8 Leadership Lessons From Pixar

Make decisions thinking 20 years into the future (the 26th Oct newsletter)

How can you contribute?

Each one of us is on a leadership journey. Our journeys might not look alike. They might resemble more of a roller-coaster ride than a race track, and that is what makes each one of us special and unique in our own ways. I am deeply touched when someone takes the time to share their story with me. The leaders I work with are also left inspired when we listen to each other’s leadership journeys.

If you think that your leadership journey is worth sharing and would be valuable to others, reach out and allow me the privilege to interview you. If you would like to recommend someone else who I should interview, feel free to write to me. You can send me a message on LinkedIn or send me an email at sumit@deployyourself.com.

That’s all for this week! I wish you all a happy and prosperous 2022. Until then, keep Choosing Leadership.

See you next week with the regular newsletter.

With gratitude,

Sumit

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter. Every two weeks I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

Two Ways To Dissolve Your Problems

Many of us have made a living and a career out of solving problems. What I am realising in the last few years is that there is something better than solving problems – it is dissolving them, or making them go away completely. I have found there are 2 ways to dissolve our problems:-

1. Find and eliminate (or redesign) the context that “has the problem” – Any problem does not exist independent of the entity (person, organisation, etc) or the environment that has the problem. For example – I have a pen in my hand right now. The pen exists as a physical object independent of me. However, any problem is not physical like the pen. My problem only exists for “me” – or how I see things. An organisation’s problems also only exist for that organisation – or how that organisation looks at it.
   
   If you remove or redesign the entity that “has the problem”, the problem can dissolve with it. The situation remains as it is, but it stops being a problem. Such an approach requires identifying our (or our organisation’s) blind spots. It requires questioning our own deeply held beliefs, identifying our mental models which block us from moving forward, and then deliberately replacing them.
   
   When I started out on my own as a Leadership Coach with Deploy Yourself earlier this year, I had a big problem that “I am not good at sales” and it created a lot of anxiety and stress. However, with the help of my coach, I redesigned the context from “selling something” to “elevate leadership in every conversation I have”.
   
   This has allowed me to not fall into the trap of traditional marketing and sales tactics which I hated, and instead, I have only relied on making difference to people in every conversation I have. This has enabled me to create an invite and referral only business without a lot of stress and anxiety and work with some very powerful and inspirational leaders.
   
2. Take on a bigger problem – Another way to make your current problem go away is to take on a much bigger problem consciously. For example – One of my coachees was raising 500k USD for their charity and facing big problems in asking for money. After our coaching, he took on a much bigger problem of raising 5 million USD to make a larger impact, and suddenly all his previous problems have disappeared.
   
   He might not hit the 5 million he had promised, but he will certainly overshoot the 500k he was going after initially. Today he is making single fundraising requests for 500k USD, and his confidence, ability, self-esteem, and credibility has already transformed compared to when we started working together.

Does that make sense? If anything is unclear from the above or it sparked a question, reply back. If you are thinking it can’t be that easy, remember I never said it would be.

The above is very simple when you understand it fully, but not easy. Reply back to share what you think. I read and respond to every reply.

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

5 Wrong ideas about work

Find out 5 wrong ideas about work in this article by Lesley. The problem arises when it’s actually the wrong idea for you but you fail to see that. This means you get unnecessarily stuck by a self-limiting worldview that wasn’t actually true for you.

1. Work is the soul-sucking thing I do every day to get money.
2. I need to do work I’m passionate about.
3. I need to know exactly what I want to do with my life.
4. I’m not qualified to do this work.
5. I need this job because I need the money.

From the article “Wrong ideas about work”

Two

Why managing uncertainty is a key leadership skill

If the last two years has shown us anything, it is that we are living in an uncertain and unpredictable world. COVID-19 has brought into sharp relief a crucial business skill: the ability to navigate uncertainty.

That means knowing what you can control and what you cannot, aligning your company and employees with a shared purpose, holding to a clear vision of where you want the company to be, and trusting your team to help your company get there.

Because nobody knows what is next, no CEO can reasonably be taken to task for not knowing everything. That provides an opening for leaders who have deployed a top-down, command-and-control leadership style to switch to a mindset that helps them and their teams better navigate uncertain conditions.

The biggest challenge for many business leaders, in Leavitt’s view, is to see their role as orchestrating, not commanding. That means making sure your employees are in touch with their own desires and potential just as much as your business is aligned with its sense of purpose.

From an article on strategy+business – Why managing uncertainty is a key leadership skill

Three

7 Most Powerful Investments You Can Make

What comes to your mind when you are asked about the most powerful investments you should make? Is it stocks? Is it bonds? Or a new house? Real estate is the safest investment, you might have heard.

If you ask me, I would say, neither!

Over the course of my life, with its few successes and numerous failures, I have come to see another type of investment that will give you the maximum returns – investing in yourself.

All that is good thinking, but I have discovered that there are some simple investments we can make in ourselves which we tend to miss or neglect. And for most of these are not even financial. You don’t need to have money to do this kind of investing.

“Investing in yourself is the best thing you can do. If you’ve got talents, no one can take them from you.” — Warren Buffett

Investing in yourself is a continuous process. The effort and time you put in to invest in yourself consistently will determine the quality of life you would be leading in the future.

Below are the 7 most powerful investments you can make:-

1. Reading books
2. Foundational knowledge of how the world works
3. Nurturing ‘positive’ habits
4. Communication and interpersonal skills
5. Writing
6. Trusting people by default
7. Knowing what you stand for

From an article from my desk – The 7 Most Powerful Investments You Can Make. They Are Not What You Think

Four

A Face-to-Face Request Is 34 Times More Successful Than an Email

A new study finds that people tend to overestimate the power of their persuasiveness via text-based communication and underestimate the power of their persuasiveness via face-to-face communication.

In one experiment, 45 participants were instructed to ask 10 strangers to complete a survey. Half the participants made the request over email, and half made it face-to-face.

Participants who made requests over email felt just as confident about the effectiveness of their requests as those who made their requests face-to-face, and yet the face-to-face requests were 34 times more effective than the emailed ones.

From an article on HBR titled A Face-to-Face Request Is 34 Times More Successful Than an Email

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Dear reader,

The What

For the last two months, I have been interviewing leaders and sharing their leadership journeys in a mini-newsletter. As a subscriber to this (Deploy Yourself) newsletter, you will get the best-curated insights from these interviews in a mini-email like this one. I will send it in the gap week between two regular newsletters. You can also read this mini-issue online.

The Why

We all have a lot to learn from the stories of our leaders – of how they came to be where they are today. These are stories peers and friends don’t usually know, and my attempt is to give you an opportunity to learn from those who have already tasted success and made an impact.

Find out about the events from their lives that shaped them to be the person and leader they are. In the interview, they also share about the people who have influenced them the most in their leadership.

The Who(s)

Mark Horoszowski – “Leadership takes a lot of practice, introspection, and training!”

Mark Horoszowski is the CEO and co-founder of MovingWorlds – which is an award-winning social enterprise that helps individuals scale world-changing ideas. He shares how coming from an immigrant family helped him to be more open to giving and receiving help than most people. He talks about the importance of physical activities for approaching any issue from different perspectives.

In his own words, “Leadership is a challenging skill that takes a lot of practice, introspection, and training.” He further talks about his passion for fairness. “Creating a fair and sustainable planet means we need to tackle the biggest system challenges of our time, and I’m passionate about using my time and skills to do that.”, he adds.

Read the full interview with Mark here

Related resources

A message to Garcia – A 1899 essay by Elbert Hubbard which reminds me of the power of taking responsibility (in the context of leadership)

Five Different Perspectives You Can Apply In Each Situation

The Power of 5 Minutes

How to Listen Well and the Massive Difference it can make

How can you contribute?

Each one of us is on a leadership journey. Our journeys might not look alike. They might resemble more of a roller-coaster ride than a race track, and that is what makes each one of us special and unique in our own ways. I am deeply touched when someone takes the time to share their story with me. The leaders I work with are also left inspired when we listen to each other’s leadership journeys.

If you think that your leadership journey is worth sharing and would be valuable to others, reach out and allow me the privilege to interview you. If you would like to recommend someone else who I should interview, feel free to write to me. You can send me a message on LinkedIn or send me an email at sumit@deployyourself.com.

That’s all for this week! If you have any questions, don’t hesitate. Just hit reply.

See you next week with the regular newsletter.

With gratitude,

Sumit

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter. Every two weeks I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

Three Ways To Shape Your Future

All of us are heading into a “future”.

The only question is – Is it a future of our choosing? Or is it a “default future” – the one that is waiting for us if things continue as they are?

Part of being a leader is acknowledging that we do not control our future. Once you accept that, you stop fighting things not being your way.

That allows you the humility and freedom from resistance and frustration. It allows you to be in charge of your actions.

You can not control your future. But you can shape it. You can always be in charge, never in control.

Understand and take charge of your emotions, your thoughts & conversations, and your actions. And you will start to shape your future.

Three specific ways you can shape your future is by:

1. Declare and go after what you want. If you want something, either go after it or stop “wanting”. Continuing to want a future but not going after it is an invitation for disempowering emotions like frustration, resentment, and hopelessness. Make a declaration (to a limited set of people or publicly) to bring forth your commitment for the journey from where you are now to where you want to be.
2. Ask and make requests for what you need. Unless you ask, the answer will always be NO. Ask people to join hands with you. Ask people to support you financially or with other resources. Ask people to volunteer their time. And if you can not figure out what to ask to whom, ask for advice and help. Find out who has done what you want to do before, and ask for mentoring or coaching.
3. Take the next tiny step. Often it is having a simple conversation. Every time you are stuck, ask yourself – what is the next conversation I can have? Sometimes it is a conversation you need to have with yourself (self-reflection)? Unless you take the next step, you will always be in the same place. Go have the next conversation.

What are you living into a default future? Are you ok with that? If yes, wonderful. However, if not, what is the next step you can take? What is the missing conversation that you are not having?

If anything is unclear from the above or it sparked a question, reply back. If you are thinking it can’t be that easy, remember I never said it would be. The above is very simple when you understand it fully, but not easy. Reply back to share what you think. I read and respond to every reply.

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

Why Unreasonable Goals Are Better For Your Growth And Success?

We all have our definitions of what is reasonable and what is not. You know what’s reasonable and what is not, and you set reasonable goals for yourself.

This sounds like a fine approach, but is it?

Setting unreasonable goals could, in fact, be the better choice. That means aiming for what you think is unreasonable, looking at your reasonable goals and raising the bar a few notches.

When setting goals you’re easily capable of achieving, you avoid chances of failure but also avoid reaching your full potential. It was Robert Browning who said that “a man’s reach should exceed his grasp.” 

What if we are capable of achieving much more than we think? Wouldn’t it be a pity if we never found out, and keep aiming too low.

In this article, I share that the most important benefit of going for unreasonable goals is that it will help you expand as a person. You can lose your money and possessions. But you can never lose what you have become.

It is not about what you get or achieve. It is about who you BECOME.

From an article from my desk

Two

10 lessons from 10 years of Entrepreneurship

1. Leave room for magic. Don’t let logic control you.
2. Your secret ingredient is people. Quickly recognize and invest in your force multipliers.
3. Contrarians often spot opportunities that others overlook. But being a contrarian doesn’t mean throwing out every industry norm.
4. Embrace the gift of feedback. What feels like friction is actually polish.
5. People might not remember what you say. But they always remember how you make them feel.
6. Develop your storytelling abilities. This will amplify everything you and your company want to say.
7. The best people will join your company for a “why,” not a “what.”
8. Culture comes from the top, the bottom, and everywhere in between.
9. Gross margins are your ticket to freedom.
10. Be prepared to give if you expect to have to take.

From an article on Fast Company where Scott Norton and Mark Ramadan, cofounders of Sir Kensington’s, share their learnings in their final shareholder letter.

Three

5 Things High-Performing Teams Do Differently

1. High-Performing Teams Are Not Afraid to Pick Up the Phone
2. High-Performing Teams Are More Strategic With Their Meetings
3. High-Performing Teams Invest Time Bonding Over Non-Work Topics
4. High-Performing Teams Give and Receive Appreciation More Frequently
5. High-Performing Teams Are More Authentic at Work

From a Harvard Business Review article by Ron Friedman

Four

How High Achievers Find Balance (podcast)

Some quotes and notes from this podcast episode with Michael Hyatt

“Fast-forward to the end of your life. What will you wish that you had done differently? Palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware recorded the regrets of her dying patients. Among the five most common? “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.” Bronnie observes, “This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. . . . All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

Many high-achieving people tend to have two leisure modes: feeling weird, unsettled, and distracted when taking time off — or vegging out on screens after exhaustion.

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi advises doing something that’s not related to work at all to get you into a different mindset.

Spending more time on a hobby that has nothing to do with work can boost confidence in your ability to perform your job well.

From a podcast interview with Michael Hyatt on the Coaching for Leaders podcast.

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Dear reader,

The What

For the last two months, I have been interviewing leaders and sharing their leadership journeys in a mini-newsletter. As a subscriber to this (Deploy Yourself) newsletter, you will get the best-curated insights from these interviews in a mini-email like this one. I will send it in the gap week between two regular newsletters. You can also read this mini-issue online.

The Why

We all have a lot to learn from the stories of our leaders – of how they came to be where they are today. These are stories peers and friends don’t usually know, and my attempt is to give you an opportunity to learn from those who have already tasted success and made an impact.

Find out about the events from their lives that shaped them to be the person and leader they are. In the interview, they also share about the people who have influenced them the most in their leadership.

The Who(s)

Penelope. – “I have learnt to not agree to deadlines imposed upon me, rather negotiate and arrive at a mutually agreeable timescale”

Penelope is the Founder & Director of Stimulus, and she is passionate about empowering women, especially women from Black & Ethnic Minority backgrounds. In the interview, she opens up about her “chaotic childhood with limited choices” and how her mother inspired her to dream bigger. She describes herself as a “nobody from nowhere“, and she loves that “she can inspire other women“. In the interview, you will see that she is anything but ordinary.

She talks about how at times what people need is a champion in their corner so that they don’t have to face it alone. She shares the importance of delegating work, and the very important skill of saying NO often to prevent yourself from getting overwhelmed. She further adds, “Doing a simple grounding exercise at my desk helps calm my mind, as does a quick walk.“

Read the full interview with Penelope here.

Erno Hannink – “I understand that I can only control how I respond to things”

Erno Hannink is, in his own words, “a business coach, a podcast host, a footfall referee, a stoic“, among other things. He says, “At the age of 53, I have just gotten a clear picture of what the meaning of my life is. Maybe I am just at the beginning”. He says being a referee on Sundays keeps him fit and gives him the confidence to speak up.

He asks some thought-provoking questions like “Why do we ruin the planet just to make cheaper products and strive for more profit? I don’t understand why we underpay women and minorities all over the world and let other people work in circumstances that we would not do.”

He starts his day by writing down a list of 3 goals that he wants to accomplish each day. To reduce noise he keeps his phone on silent and does not read newspapers, or listen to, or watch the news. His goal each day is to Improve his wisdom, courage, justice, and temperance by 1%.

Read the full interview with Erno here.

Related resources

The interview with Erno poked me to reflect on my Leadership Lighthouse and the importance of knowing our own values. We talked about how little we actually control, and how realising that is liberating. When he talked about getting 1% better daily, the importance of compound interest in our growth was crystal clear for me.

Talking to Penelope helped me remember my own struggles and the lessons I continue to learn from them. She reminded me of the importance of seeing and believing in others, and the importance of a growth mindset. When she spoke about grounding exercises and daily walks – two practices I do each day, I smiled at the time when I didn’t even know that I had a body.

How can you contribute?

Each one of us is on a leadership journey. Our journeys might not look alike. They might resemble more of a roller-coaster ride than a race track, and that is what makes each one of us special and unique in our own ways. I am deeply touched when someone takes the time to share their story with me. The leaders I work with are also left inspired when we listen to each other’s leadership journeys.

If you think that your leadership journey is worth sharing and would be valuable to others, reach out and allow me the privilege to interview you. If you would like to recommend someone else who I should interview, feel free to write to me. You can send me a message on LinkedIn or send me an email at sumit@deployyourself.com.

That’s all for this week! If you have any questions, don’t hesitate. Just hit reply.

See you next week with the regular newsletter.

With gratitude,

Sumit

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter. Every two weeks I share what impactful leadership looks like to show your own power. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

My Story – How losing my rock led me to become a rock for others?

I am sharing something very personal to me today. It has been 9 years since my mother passed away. I am still making sense of how every day without her has shaped me and continue to shape me.

I was 29 when my mother died. I am shaking while I type this because this is very vulnerable for me. It’s not that we did not have enough time together. It’s more that she never got to meet my wife and son. She never got to play with her grandson – one of the most joyful parts of life.

My mother was the center of my universe. In the last 9 years, there have been many instances when I have melted down thinking about her. There have been nights when I slept with wet eyes. Her whole life (at least the part I remember) was about her children. She shaped who I am and how I think. She was my rock.

My mother was deeply passionate about everything she did. The best word to describe her is the Hindi word “Junoon“. She had a “junoon” (passion bordering on obsession) about things. She would laugh and have loads of fun. At the same time, she would cry, get angry, and become sad at times. She was always there in the moment – fully alive, fully feeling her emotions, and fully expressing herself.

I would have her back in a second if I could, but losing her gave me a perspective on life that would not have been possible otherwise. She is still teaching me every day as I reflect back on what her passing away means for me and my future.

I have a unique appreciation of what I have because I already lost everything when my mother died. What else do I have to lose? This perspective makes it easy for me to take bold risks and see life as it is, not as I hope it should be.

Today I am living a life that I never imagined possible. I have travelled and photographed more than I ever hoped for. I have my wife and my son and I am doing each day what I want to do. I spend my time reading, writing, and in conversations with leaders who inspire me with their bold visions. Now, I am their rock. It took me a while to realise this, but I now know that my purpose is to be a rock to those who are creating a future I want to live in. That is my mother’s legacy.

I often say that I am ready to die. Realising that there is nothing more I need fills me up with a peaceful joy rather than sadness. It allows me to dream big for the future but not be attached to it. It allows me to spend each moment with the “junoon” (passion) of my mother without getting overwhelmed and disappointed with an unexpected outcome.

Losing my mother was a pain I can not describe, but I am thankful for what I am learning each day from it. It taught me not to take life for granted, and the importance of enjoying every day and each moment.

I wish my mother could see me now. And perhaps she can. I know how proud she was of me. And will continue to be. I will keep my mother’s memory alive by being a rock to those around me like she was for me.

What is your story? As I work with and interview leaders from all over the world, I realise that though our stories shape and influence us, they do not define us. They give us meaning and purpose, and what we do with that purpose is totally up to us. What events or people have shaped you to be the person that you are?

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

Lessons from my 7 favourite leadership books

Reading a book is like having a conversation with the author. I have spent the last 10 years reading hundreds of autobiographies and other leadership books from people across industries and continents. Below are 7 of my favourites (in no particular order) and my lessons from them.

1. The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership
2. Conscious Business: How to Build Value Through Values
3. True North
4. Turn the Ship Around! A True Story of Turning Followers Into Leaders
5. Leadership: In Turbulent Times
6. Finite and Infinite Games: James Carse
7. Small Giants: Companies That Choose to be Great Instead of Big

Two

10 Tools to stay mentally sharp at work

1. Take “Smart” Breaks (activities that are unlikely to become an ongoing distraction)
2. Wean Yourself Off Your Phone (Creating working spaces or times where distractions aren’t accessible)
3. Shift to the “Meta” Task (shift to a more abstract layer of a problem)
4. Apply the Yerkes-Dodson Law (more complex, creative work benefits more from a relaxed kind of focus)
5. Set Specific, Achievable, Short-Term Targets
6. Cultivate an Interruption-Free Environment
7. Jam Your Quitting Triggers
8. Master the Power Nap
9. Minimize Mental Overhead (offload what you’re doing onto paper)
10. Mindfulness meditation. Just calm your mind and let yourself gently return to the task when distracted.

From an article titled 10 Tools to stay mentally sharp at work

Three

An ultimate guide to memory palaces

This is for you if you want to remember things well and improve your memory. The brain isn’t good at storing things but generating ideas. It also depends on what sort of things, but we tend to forget them anyway. If something is unique or interesting, it’s simpler to remember, right?

It’s simple to remember spatial information. You know where the nearest shop is and where to find the section with bread. Or, where the things are placed at home. Memory palaces is a system to connect information, to memorize and retain it better. It’s not exactly a particular place, because one may have multiple palaces. It’s a private space in your head where you remember where did you “put” some information.

While the method is prominent to memorize almost anything, it doesn’t help you understand the data. You won’t learn by only memorizing. What you do is having raw information. When you retrieve it, you can then explore it better. So, one may store ideas to retrieve them later for further “investigation”.

What do you need to create the first palace:

• A place to store objects. A road, street, room, other familiar places.
• An association with real-world information you want to remember. It may be absurd, but the connection is more important.
• A connection between associations. These should be unique and funny, to better memorize a story.

From an article titled An Ultimate Guide to Memory Palaces

Four

The Benefits of Silence for a productive and meaningful life

There was an old man whose most beloved possession was a watch left to him by his late wife. He treasured the timepiece and had it on his person wherever he went. 

One day, in anticipation of his grandchildren arriving for a visit, he was cleaning out the spare room when he misplaced his watch. His grandchildren arrived to find him distraught and offered to help search the room. 

With four children and two adults combing the room, it seemed ever more cluttered and crowded than before, and the watch was still not found. As the others left the room, shaking their heads, the youngest child remained and simply sat on a chair and waited. 

A few moments passed and he walked out of the room with the watch in his hand! Overjoyed, his grandfather asked how he’d found it. The boy replied, “I sat in silence and listened for the tick-tock to lead me to it.”

From an article from my desk on the benefits of silence, how to add silence to your day, and when not to be silent

That’s it for now. If you have any questions or feedback, or just want to introduce yourself, hit reply. I read and respond to every reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect