Sumit Gupta

2013

  • जो ज़िन्दगी को जीना सीख ले – Jo Zindagi Ko Jeena Seekh Le

    जो दिल की धड़कन पहचान ले
    वोह गालो में लाली नहीं ढूँढता
    जो ज़िन्दगी को जीना सीख ले
    वोह उसमे अपने पसंदीदा रंग नहीं ढूँढता

     

    “Life has three aspects: Paradox, Humor, and Change. - Paradox: Life is a mystery; don't waste time figuring it out. - Humor: Keep a sense of humor, especially about yourself. It is a strength beyond all measure - Change: Know that nothing stays the same.” ― Peaceful Warrior
    Life is a mystery; don’t waste time figuring it out.
    ― Peaceful Warrior

    जो खुदा की दिखाई राह पे चल पड़े
    वोह मस्जिद और मंदिर नहीं ढूँढता
    जो ज़िन्दगी को जीना सीख ले
    वोह हर गली अल्लाह राम नहीं ढूँढता

     

    जो अपने काम में दिल लगाने सीख ले
    वोह दिन के बाद शाम नहीं ढूँढता
    जो जिंदगी को जीना सीख ले
    वोह शराब में अपना जाम नहीं ढूँढ़ता

     

    जो मुश्किलों में खड़ा रहना सीख ले
    वोह दूसरो में अपना सहारा नहीं ढूँढता
    जो ज़िन्दगी को जीना सीख ले
    वोह हर समुन्दर का किनारा नहीं ढूँढता

     

    जो मंजिल मंजिल मुसकाना सीख ले
    वोह हँसने के लिए चुटकुले नहीं ढूँढता
    जो ज़िन्दगी को जीना सीख ले
    वोह दूसरो में अपनी पहचान नहीं ढूँढता

     

    जो मौसम का आनंद लेना सीख ले
    वोह बारिश में छाता नहीं ढूँढता
    जो ज़िन्दगी को जीना सीख ले
    वोह रात में सूरज दिन में चाँद नहीं ढूँढता

     

    जो जीवन की शायरी पहचान ले
    वोह हर लम्हे में उसका अर्थ नहीं ढूँढता
    जो ज़िन्दगी का जीना सीख ले
    वोह हर कविता के लिए शब्द नहीं ढूँढता

  • The Cash Counter and the Little Girl

    Kids and their curiosity
    Kids and their curiosity

    “Who will eat these biscuits?”, the little girl asked her mom at the check-out counter of a nearby grocery shop. “Your papa likes them with tea, na, now give it to bhaiya”, she said pointing towards the boy at the counter. “And who will eat these?”, came the follow up question followed by another, “Can I eat them too, are they sweet or salty?”.. Little kids, and their knack of asking questions. I guess it is their way of understanding how this world works..

    But standing right behind them in the checkout line, the next thing I saw was the hand of her mom snatching away the biscuit and namkeen packets from the little girl so that they can be billed. “You talk too much, don’t you see we are already late, now keep quite and don’t touch anything”, screamed the mom, clearly frustrated and eager to get out as soon as possible.

    Ten more items later, the billing was done, and the mom hurried, with the shopping bags in one hand, and the hand of her little daughter in the other. The girl must have been thinking “What is the hurry, today is Saturday, an off for everyone?”

    Obviously she is unaware of the fact that when we humans grow up, we all find it difficult to really enjoy what each moment has to offer. We are all too caught up in the rat race, either thinking about the past or the future, but not about the present. In the above incident, the mom might very well be thinking of her daughter’s school admission, or what to cook for her at dinner, but didn’t have the time to answer the questions which are very much a part of her growing up. We all have been, and are like this mother at different times.

    How simple life is as kids? Do what you like. If you don’t know something, ask questions. You don’t know whether the questions sound silly, or no worries. You laugh with others if you see them laughing at you without getting conscious, so no worries again. Even if you realize you’ve done a mistake, you say ‘sorry’ and move on like nothing happened in the first place. You are more interested in what is going to happen the next minute, rather than what happened one hour ago, or earlier today, or yesterday, or years ago. You can get excited by little things like a biscuit or the colors of the your dress, and your expression can change from a smile to a frown to again a smile within five seconds.

    But alas, I am a grown up now, and maybe I am not supposed to talk, think or write like this.

  • जाने क्यों – Jaane Kyu

    तुम्हे देखा तो तुम्हारी आँखों से
    तुम्हे सुना तो तुम्हारी आवाज़ से
    जाने क्यों मुझे प्यार हो गया !!

    तुमने पुकारा तो तुम्हारे होठो से
    तुम पास आई तो तुम्हारी सासों से
    जाने क्यों मुझे प्यार हो गया !!

    तुम्हारे बाल लहराए तो उनकी लटो से
    तुमने कदम बढ़ाये तो तुम्हारी पायल से
    जाने क्यों मुझे प्यार हो गया !!

    तुम शरमाई तो तुम्हारी अदा से
    तुम मुस्काई तो तुम्हारी हसी से
    जाने क्यों मुझे प्यार हो गया !!

    तुम्हे पहचाना तो तुम्हारी हस्ती से
    और तुमने धमकाया तो तुम्हारी धमकी से
    जाने क्यों मुझे प्यार हो गया !!

  • सपने देखना मत छोड़ना – Sapne Dekhna Mat Chhodna

    सपने ऐसे देखो जो अम्बर से करे बात
    लेकिन कभी धरती की पकड़ ना छोड़ना !
    चाहे जितनी बार खानी पड़े मात
    लेकिन सपने देखना नहीं छोड़ना !!

     

    अपनी तरफ आती हर मुसीबत
    को हिम्मत से सीखो लड़ना !
    जब उम्मीदों की हर दीवार दह जाए
    तो भी सपने देखना मत छोड़ना !!

     

    Don't Dream your Lives, Live your Dreams
    Don’t Dream your Lives, Live your Dreams

    शरीर या बदन के थकने पर नहीं
    काम पूरा होने पर ही दोस्तों बैठना !
    अगर रात भी काम करने में गुजर जाए
    तो भी सपने देखना नहीं छोड़ना !!

     

    चाहे दिन, माह और साल निकल जाए
    बेशक निकल जाये खून, या बह जाए पसीना !
    मंजिल की तलाश में अगर कुम्भ भी निकल जाए
    तो भी तुम सपने देखना मत छोड़ना !!

     

    इस रस्ते निकल पड़े तो वापस नहीं मुड़ना है
    क्या कर सकते है हम इस दुनिया को दिखाना है !
    पर्वत चट्टानों से भी आगे हमें जाना है
    हर कदम पे नए सपने देखना नहीं छोड़ना है !!

  • 3 Simple Secrets of Love

    Life is simple, very simple indeed. But we humans take great pride in making it complicated. I think it is because we get our sense of worth by doing something tough, solving some complex problem or achieving some goal. So the idea of life being simple is very difficult to grasp for most of us.

    Like life, the solutions or secrets behind solving most of our problems are also very simple. In this article I want to point out three very simple secrets for love. When I say love, I mean love between any two human beings, and not necessarily romantic love. It could also be love between two strangers, but the secrets are the same. Also they are nothing which you don’t already know or something which I have ‘discovered‘, they are plain old undeniable truths which we all are aware of, but rarely practice in our lives.

    Here they go –

    Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated. - Confucius
    Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated. – Confucius

    1. Delight at Sight

    We all must ask ourselves a few questions here –

    • How excited are we on seeing our parents after coming home from work?
    • How happy are we on seeing our colleagues daily at work?
    • How joyful we become on meeting our friends over the weekend?
    • Do we smile and wish our neighbors when we crash into them every now and then?

    Delight at sight means a feeling of absolute delight on seeing another human being. The delight of knowing that we have parents to care for us, friends to share a beer with, a spouse to share our life, and colleagues to work along with. Do we smile, run towards them, and wish or hug them with a big smile on our face?

    We all know a few such people in our lives, and if we look deeply we will know that how much love they give and receive. If you have no human examples, look at your dog or cat and observe their behaviour. Can you see the “Delight at Sight” secret in them?

    2. Marshal People By Example

    Giving a lecture is so much easy than acting ourselves on what we are lecturing about. Just like writing this article is a lot more easy for me than to actually practice this stuff daily. But love spreads from sacrifice and compassion towards another, by teaching something by example. By doing something ourselves, and making ourselves a 10x better example of what we are trying to suggest/teach to the other person is the only way to sow the seeds of love in any relationship.

    I can see my father as a perfect example of this. And I am sure we all can see the same in our parents. And it is a very hard process, as you have to continue practice living your life as an example, minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day, and so on. And if we want to preach a principle, we have to live our lives at least a 10 time multiple of that principle. It takes a BIG man to do that…

    3. Heart to Heart

    We should aspire to live more from our heart than from our brain. We should tap into the emotions and feelings which make us human (but not be driven by them) because the strongest human connections and love always originate from our hearts, and never from our brains. We should show an endless stream of compassion towards our fellow beings as each one of us is fighting very similar battles. Support people instead of criticizing, forgive them instead of holding a grudge and love them instead of judging them.

    However, this is not something we should (or can) fake. Heart to Heart means being true to our feelings and never lying about how one feels. If you are sad – cry, if you are angry – shout; but get over it soon and pour out compassion for yourself and for others too. Do what you want to do, and give others space to do what they want to do.

  • Three More Steps to take as an Entrepreneur for your Employees

    Last year I wrote an article about three small steps in treating our employees that can make a big difference as an entrepreneur. Great teams are made up of employees who help each other, know their roles, set aside personal goals, and value team success over everything else. I want to expand those steps and add three more very simple things we can do –

    Your first few employees will make or break your company
    Your first few employees will make or break your company

    4. Be the First to Take the Blame
    Whenever something goes wrong, as it will many times, it is the boss’s duty and responsibility to be visible and face the music from inside and outside. Otherwise, anger, upsets and blame can set in and make things worse for the future. While taking blame, you also have to be honest about what is happening and efficient in dealing with the repercussions.

    5. And the Last to Take Credit
    Always give credit to the team first, because any success you have is actually theirs. That doesn’t mean discounting your role which you should always acknowledge. But your success is not only yours, and that’s why you should pass on every credit you get to the people behind, who normally wont get much visibility. Make sure they know their part in the success and importance in the company.

    6. Make Sure Your Employees know how much They Mean to You
    If someone is working a weekend for you, make sure you are there too. Otherwise, do something to let them know how much that means to you. Nobody wants to work on a weekend, and it is your duty to acknowledge their effort and responsibility to make them feel thanked for their contribution.

  • Building a New Floor

    As I was completing my third round of jogging in the neighborhood park, I suddenly stopped at the sight of a new house just across the park.

    “Something is different today.“, I said to myself, as somehow it caught my attention. It certainly had been under construction for some time now, and I remember seeing it on many previous morning jogs too. After pondering for a few minutes, I got the difference – the support beams were gone. The house was standing on its own.

    If you are building a new floor, you will need support.
    If you are building a new floor, you will need support.

    Over the past few weeks, as I went passed this house, it was all messy with wooden logs or beams supporting each floor as it was built. There was mud, rocks and all kind of construction material outside the house, and inside there were only walls with red dirty bricks, and a few workers in dirt filled clothes going about their chores. Everybody walking on the street looked at everywhere but this house. Very frankly, it was not a pretty sight and people turned away from that side of the road while walking.

    But today, the beams were gone and there was a layer of cement and white paint on the walls. The front entrance was getting cleaned, and much of the machinery and construction material was gone. Sunlight was coming in from the side and the new floor and walls were reflecting it illuminating the house, giving it a very different look from just a few days ago. And everyone walking on the road couldn’t continue without stopping and glancing at the new beautiful house, admiring it and wishing one for themselves.

    Isn’t that the way of life and nature? Everything beautiful ever built was once messy and needed support. I guess the same holds true for great human beings and relationships. As we make different new floors on our life building, we will need the support of beams, we will look like a mess from the outside, and people will look the other way.

    But once you finally complete the new floor, everybody will stop by and ask how you did that? Some will say you are lucky, and many will stop and admire you for creating your life the way it looks like. And they will wish they could do the same.

    And they can. Everybody can. But then they have to take support of the beams. They would have to be OK with a little mess now and then. They would have to be OK with people seeing the other side when they most need support. Every dream has a price to be paid for. The only question is – are you willing to pay the price for your dream home, or your dream life?

  • Are You Out Of Balance In Your Life, And How To Maintain It

    While cycling, many times we tilt over one side or the other, but we must bring our self back in balance, or else we will end up falling. The same goes for life and business, and basically everything that we do. We need to have the right balance between the various sides of your business, work, life or we will end up falling on one side.

    From my experience, I can tell you that most of my life have been anything but balanced. Except in the last few years, I have always given more time to things that I was interested in, and not enough to uninteresting though important things. If in my school and college days I focused too much on computers to suffer in every other subject, in my professional life I have been too much of a workaholic to allow my health and family relationships suffer. We can keep doing this for sometime, but after a while, we need to maintain our balance or we end up falling on one side (bad scores, bad health, or broken relationships).

    Without balance, this paradox becomes a reality
    Without balance, this paradox becomes a reality

    Maintaining a balanced life is a continuous journey and the definition of balance changes as our priorities change. While there is nothing wrong in being focused more on one aspect of life than another (like money over family, or work over health) but it is also important to realize that neglecting one part of life will have its consequences in the future. However, living a balanced life will have its trade offs too. If you are not putting as much hours in your office as your peers, you might end up getting less money or being passed over for that promotion. So it is always a trade-off and a personal decision.

    Over Compensating One for the Other
    Many people think that if they work harder in one area, results in that area can compensate for the lack of results in another area. For example – You might feel getting more money (and the power that comes with it) might compensate for the lack of time you spend with your family. But what I have seen is that, on the contrary, if you get more engaged in building your career and business, you get under a lot of obligations that you will have even less time for your other priorities.

    Keep All Ends in Mind
    Keeping both ends in mind, and understanding the trade-offs is the key to a balanced life. Depending on where your education, work, family, kids, contribution to society, or anything else sits on your priority list, you can tilt on one side from time to time, but you have to make sure of switching to the other sides too from time to time if you want to prevent a fall.

    Pay Attention
    To keep a balanced life, it is important to ask ourselves the hard questions about what our priorities are, and keep a close eye on the trade offs with each option. Examine different areas of your life and set goals which will decide the way you want to balance your life. Make a plan on how to do that, and stick to it. It is very important to learn to say ‘no’ to even big opportunities if they dont fit in your plan, or understand the trade offs if you say ‘yes’.

    “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” ― Albert Einstein
    “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.”
    ― Albert Einstein

  • The Strawberry and The Tigers

    “Faster, faster”, he said to himself as he ran through the narrow path between the thick forest on both sides. He remembered how his coach used to train him to run fast during college athletic meets. Of course this was no college, and he was sure his coach had never been chased by a tiger.

    “Grrr”, the roar of the tiger brought him back to attention, and he started looking for a hideout where the tiger would not be able to go. He remembered the tunnel he had passed some distance ago – “I should have entered it and hid there, and maybe the tiger would have given it a miss.” “But what if the tiger would have followed me and the tunnel had no other end?” – he smiled as he realized it was the right decision to not enter that tunnel.

    Are you eating your strawberries?
    Are we eating our strawberries? Or do we miss them in the daily grind of life running from our own version of tigers?

    His eyes lit up as he saw a steep cliff a little ahead on the left. He changed course and headed for the cliff knowing that he has to climb it down, being pretty sure that a tiger can’t follow him down the cliff. What was even better that the cliff had deep vegetation and thick bushes which he could use to climb down!

    He took a strong hold of the bushes and threw himself over the cliff. He could feel his hands getting soaked in blood as he climbed down the bushes. But it didn’t hurt as he finally felt safe. He enjoyed the sight of seeing the tiger roaring at the top but unable to do anything. He continued to climb down, now the bushes were a lot thinner and very soon it was just rock. He saw a rope hanging till the bottom of the cliff, probably left behind by some mountaineer. He caught hold of it and continued his descent, until he heard another big roar.

    What made him shiver was the knowledge that the roar didn’t came from above, but from below him. He held onto the rope, and unwillingly looked down, fearing the worst. And there it was, another tiger waiting for him. “What happened to my luck today?” – he thought as he was caught between the two tigers waiting for him. He held onto the rope, now that he had no other option.

    Just when he thought things could not get any worse he saw two rats coming out of a tiny opening among the rocks and move towards the rope. In the absence of anything soft to chew on, the rope was a perfect time pass for them. “Oh no, crap..”, he uttered as he tried to move and shake away the rats. But he stopped not knowing the strength of the rope and fearing that it might break faster by his shaking than by being chewed away from the rats.

    But as he has moved left and right with the rope to shake away the rats, he saw a beautiful strawberry plant on one side. He paused for a while, and then took the risk of swinging to that side and pluck a few strawberries with one hand. “They look delicious.”, he thought as he looked at them. The next moment he was enjoying the sweet taste of the strawberries in his mouth. “Wow, tastes just as well”, was his joyful expression as he cherished the strawberries in his mouth.

  • माँ की हस्ती – Maa Ki Hasti (Who is a mother?)

    सागर से भी विशाल हो प्यार जिसका
    जो हर ठोकर के बाद दिखाए सही रास्ता
    जो इन्सान होकर भी हो एक फ़रिश्ता
    उस हस्ती को कहते है माँ !!

    जो तुम्हारी फ़िक्र को तुमसे पहले जाने
    जो तुम्हे तुम्से भी बहतर पहचाने
    तुम्हारी हर इच्छा पे जो कह दे हा
    उस हस्ती को कहते है माँ !!

    A mother is person who can take the place of all others, but whose place no one else can take. - Cardinal Mermillod
    A mother is person who can take the place of all others, but whose place no one else can take. – Cardinal Mermillod

    जिसकी गोद हो तुम्हारा तकिया
    जो तुम्हे सुलाए गाते हुए लोरिया
    हमेशा रहेगी साथ जिसकी दुआ
    उस हस्ती को कहते है माँ !!

    जो ऊँगली पकड़ चलना सिखाए
    हर मुस्किल में होसला बढ़ाये
    अपने खून से जो लिखे हमारा भविश्य
    उस हस्ती को कहते है माँ !!

    जो तुम्हे मारे भी प्यार से
    तुमसे रूठे तो भी प्यार से
    तुम्हारे आँसू देख जो रो पड़े
    उस हस्ती को कहते है माँ !!

    जो आँख खोले तो तुम्हे ही ढूंढे ,
    आँख बंद हो तो तुम्हारे ही सपने देखे
    जो खुदा से भी मांगे तुम्हारी ही खुशिया
    उस हस्ती को कहते है माँ !!

  • The Wise Barber

    “How are things with your son, Sir?“, I overheard the barber as I was getting my hair cut in the neighborhood barber shop last week.

    “It kind of improved after my last visit here, but is heading back to a state where we rarely talk..“, replied the man with gray hair. The wrinkles on his face suggested he was easily above 50.

    The Wise Barber
    The Wise Barber

    In that split second when I heard this statement, I remembered my many trips to the barber shop during my childhood and how the barber would be the one person to know everyone in the colony and what is happening in their lives. And the way people used to talk about others lives in a barber shops seem to suggest that people have given them exclusive licenses to broadcast their life events. After a gap of a few seconds, the old man spoke again.

    “After I talked to him frankly and openly, it felt a lot better. We talked in the evenings after dinner and it was like he was opening up. But then again, he got distant and quiet without any reason. Then there were a few instances where I lost my cool and shouted at him. Then there were all those negative emotions in my mind and it made it very difficult for me to make the efforts when he acts so cold.”

    “I think you were in exactly the same position when you last came in?“, asked the barber.

    “Yes. Both with my hair and with my relationship with my son, they have come a full circle.“, said the old man jokingly.

    “And that is the rule of life. Some things grow back up and have to be cut regularly. It is the same with negative emotions. I can cut your hair, but we all have to cut our negativeness ourselves. Nobody will do that for us.“, replied the barber.

    There was a long pause after that as the old man pondered over the wise words we all at the barber shop just heard. After he was done, he got up and said, “Yes, you are right. There are no barber shops for negative emotions. We have to do the job ourselves.” And then he left the shop.

    I bet his relationship with his son would have taken on a positive note after that.

  • 5 Simple Ways We Can Slow Down and Make Our Each Day Worthwhile and Enjoyable

    We all live our days hurrying through life, and going after tasks and deadlines. In this mad rush called life, it is very easy to miss all those little pleasures which each day has to offer. In the rush to live, we sometimes forget to pause and actually live the present moment. If you are not clear on what I am trying to convey, think when was the last time you ate lunch without thinking about that call in the afternoon or the deadline you have to complete by the end of day. When was the last time you really cherished the meal you ate, and tasted every flavor it had to offer, or thought about how it was made?

    We should never forget this quote
    We should never forget this quote

    Taking a pause in doing our so called mundane and day to day tasks and savoring each moment of our days can be truly magical. And we can savor not just food, but anything else too. It is wonderful, and it changes everything. Below are some simple ways we can make our days truly wonderful, and to fully enjoy the gift each moment has to offer –

    1. Food – So the next time we eat, let us savor each bite before we move on to take the next bite. Let us slow the eating process down, and give some space to the activity of eating. Let us eat to cherish the beautiful activity eating is, and not for just fueling up for the next task at work.
    2. Exercise – Whenever you walk, jog, or do some other form of exercise, enjoy it fully. Do not let exercise become a chore to do just for keeping healthy, or some task we have to get over with. Go for a quiet run (remove the earphones) amid nature and listen to the birds chirping, and the sounds of twigs and leaves as you run past them. Notice your breathing, notice how you get tired, notice when you slow down. Feel the feet as it touches the ground, and feel the wind as it blows past you. Doing this will make exercising more enjoyable, and you will get more out of it.
    3. Daily Commute – We all spend a lot of time commuting to and from work daily. Normally we just wait for the traffic to clear so that we reach our destination as soon as possible. But for a change next time, sit quietly and observe the surroundings on your way. Observe the different people in their cars and bikes, observe the street hawkers and shopkeepers by the road side, observe the kids playing near the traffic junction, or just watch the traffic cops do their job. Cherish the road the way it is – full of potholes or an expressway, cherish the trees and buildings you pass by. By doing that, we are not wasting our time in commuting, but we are enriching our experience of those few hours you spend daily to and from work.
    4. Weather – Normally our experience of weather is to pass judgement – “it is too cold”, or “this humidity will kill me”, or “why did it had to rain today” and so on… Weather is not something in our control, so obviously we will be surprised by some sudden weather change. But instead of cursing it if it gets in our day to day lives, we can try to slow down and enjoy what it has to offer. If it is humid, let get drenched in sweat and take a shower when we get back home. If it is raining, let’s feel the rain drops on our body as a child does. If it is cold, let’s enjoy the chill while it lasts. The same goes for spring, summer and fall. Let us enjoy the beauty each season has to offer, rather than trying to suit the weather to our comfort.

    "Slow down and enjoy life. It's not only the scenery you miss by going to fast-you also miss the sense of where you are going and why." --Eddie Cantor
    “Slow down and enjoy life. It’s not only the scenery you miss by going to fast-you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.”
    –Eddie Cantor

    5. Writing – As with any other task, even writing gets enjoyable if we slow down and be with it fully. If we focus on our fingers as type (or write) words and sentences, and on the thoughts we are writing about, it becomes enjoyable. Notice how our thoughts turn into words and how lucky we are to be able to do so. Isn’t that realization enjoyable, and the experience something to be cherished!!

    Stopping and enjoying every moment just the way it is, as I described above, is not easy and takes practice. You can do it right now – where ever you are and irrespective of what you are doing. When we slow down, we notice a lot of things we miss otherwise. These things are all very small and trivial, but enjoying them is what makes life worthwhile. Nothing can be as enjoyable as cherishing each moment as it comes, and whatever it brings with it.

  • How standing for something bigger than yourself is related to motivation?

    Do you take big goals in life and then find yourself dis-empowered and not take any actions at the first sight of a breakdown. Doesn’t demotivation and procrastination set in when we face setbacks and lower than expected results? I have seen this many times in my own life. I decide on a new goal and make big plans for it which leaves me motivated and ready for action. But as soon as I face a few setbacks and know that the targets I set are not going to be achieved, I give up even on what moderate numbers I can achieve. Why so?

    At the same time, there have been times, when I have seen myself work out of my own capacity, even when the chips are down. These were the times where I didn’t even make an effort to stay motivated, but somehow I went out of my skin to give my best. I have often wondered what has been the difference in these two cases? The difference I have observed is standing for something bigger than oneself.

    Are people counting on you for something?
    What I have observed is that people who were doing their best were often those on whom others were counting on for something. For example – I have seen my mother beat cancer three times and do things during her treatment that has astonished doctors and relatives alike. The kind of courage she showed made one of the top chemotherapy specialists of the country remark – “You are the only patient I have seen who keep on coming smiling and asks for one more round of chemotherapy!!” And she has gone through around 20 rounds of chemotherapy, and all have been miserably painful and unbearable for her. But what gave her this power?

    What do you stand for?
    What do you stand for?

    I think it was because she knew her family was counting on her. Both of us brothers were still studying, and she wanted to see us achieve success in life. That is what she always told the doctors – “I am not dying now, before seeing my children grow up.” I am sure she would have given up far more easily if she wanted to get back healthy only for herself, as any cancer patient will testify that chemotherapy is even worse than dying. But she had a purpose larger than herself, and that made her victorious over cancer.

    I have seen the same with myself when I was with InfoEdge in Noida leading a team of 14 people. Knowing that they were counting on me made me do things which I was neither willing nor capable of doing at that time. And that year is still one of the most humbling and learning experience of my life.

    It is so easy to give up when you only think about yourself

    When you are only worried about doing something for yourself, it is very hard to keep yourself motivated when you don’t see the expected results happening. We found it the most easy to give up on our promises to ourselves as it doesn’t seem ‘wrong’. That is why it is so hard to motivate ourself in the face of challenges and obstacles when we want something only for ourselves. It is so tough to take the tough decisions and keep going when we don’t have some bigger purpose to serve rather than just our own desires.

    Conclusion
    So the next time you find yourself dis-empowered, try to work out of a context which is bigger than yourself or what you want. The minute you stop focusing on yourself, all of your pity, self doubt and worry will melt away. You will find courage to deal with things, and a new found peace and satisfaction in your lives. You will do the hardest of tasks without getting tired. The more you think about yourself, the weaker you will become. The more you recognize that your life is serving a bigger purpose, the stronger you will become. And this holds true in all areas of life – family, work, business, etc.

    And as I write this I realize that I have no such purpose left in my life bigger than myself.. and I know I need to find, or create one soon..

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