January 2021

6 Advantages of Strengths-Based Leadership and Management (And Why Should Managers Stop “Fixing” People?)

Does your manager focus only on your weaknesses and never talks about your strengths? You are not alone. According to Gallup, only one out of 3 employees would say they have the freedom to do what they excel at every day. That’s because many managers tend to focus more on fixing their employees’ mistakes than promoting a strengths-based culture.

Gallup’s research has proved that using a strength-based approach to better what workers are already good at creates more engaged employees and increases your organization’s productivity immensely.

Gallup further suggests that learning programs focused on fixing weaknesses are fundamentally flawed since they seek to make employees who they are not. There is, therefore, a fundamental need for organizations to look at themselves in the mirror to see if they are doing things right.

You Are Enough, And Perfect The Way You Are

4 Reasons to Run Away If Your Manager Focuses on Weaknesses

Everybody loves to be appreciated for what they excel or are good at. If your manager only focuses on your weaknesses rather than what you are good at, it will lead to friction and demotivation over time. The following are some reasons why you shouldn’t try fixing people.

1. Fixing People doesn’t Work

Gallup found that 22% of employees with managers who focus on their weaknesses are actively disengaged compared to only one percent for employees with managers who concentrate on strengths. When you focus on weaknesses, you create friction since nobody appreciates when their flaws are put under the spotlight.

This leads to demotivation and consequently, decreased productivity. Some employees could also choose to find employment elsewhere where their strengths are appreciated more.

2. Focusing on Weaknesses Ignores Strengths

A 2016 study found that people tend to see weaknesses as more malleable than strength. That would explain why many managers are still trying to fix mistakes. However, focusing on weaknesses blinds a manager from seeing the potential in their employees. They, therefore, miss out on opportunities to better what their workers are already good at.

Strengths can be improved too, and developing them creates extraordinary room for growth. Managers should identify their employees’ natural talents and invest their time and energy in turning them into super strengths.

3. Everybody Has Weaknesses

No human being is perfect, and yet everyone is. Unfortunately, some managers still hold on to the unrealistic goal of perfecting their employees by eliminating their weaknesses. It would be better to accept people for whom they are instead of wasting time on fixing weaknesses.

Faults will always be present; the challenge is to look beyond them. Instead of looking at the bad, which not only wastes time but also creates friction, managers should concentrate on making what their workers are already good at better.

4. Focussing On Weaknesses Says “I Know Better”

Developing trust and accountability in the workplace is essential. Instead of fixing weaknesses, leaders need to “care” for their people by trusting their employees’ ability to deliver on expectations.

In another research, Gallup found that managers contribute to 70% of the variance in their worker’s engagement levels. Fixing people takes an “I know better” attitude. Instead of imposing their standards, managers should lend their ear to their employees and work with them to see where learning is needed.

“If you spend your life trying to be good at everything, you will never be great at anything.”
― Tom Rath

Be Comfortable In Your Own Skin

6 Advantages of Strengths-based Leadership

Regardless of what you believe in, the truth is that focusing on the weaknesses of your employees will not get you far. The following are advantages of strength-based leadership and management.

1. Faster Growth in Learning new Skills and Jobs

Improving your employee’s strengths makes them a lot more of what they truly are. When you focus your energy on improving people’s natural abilities, you will realize that they can achieve even what you thought they couldn’t.

It is, therefore, important to assign roles based on employees’ strengths. A strength-based approach will enable employees to acquire new skills and learn new jobs faster. They are also more likely to be successful in their roles.

2. Better Productivity

When your employees get a chance to concentrate on their strengths every day, you get a better return on time and effort invested. According to Gallup’s data, employees who work on areas of strengths are 7.8% more productive.

Additionally, concentrating on your team’s strengths daily increases your employees’ productivity levels by 12.5%. Maximizing strengths in the workplace also positively impacts the health of your workforce resulting in fewer sick days. This will improve the company’s bottom line in the process.

3. Better Attitude and Mental Health.

When you play to your employees’ strengths, work becomes fun instead of a source of stress. If your workers spend more hours in a day using their strengths, they are less likely to experience mental health issues such as anger, sadness, worry, anxiety, and stress.

36% of those who use their strengths for 10 hours everyday experience stress. According to a study, this number rises to 52% for people who use their strengths only three hours a day. If you choose a strengths-based approach, your workers will experience an increase in positive emotions. They are likely to be happier and to have a positive attitude about work.

4. Higher Engagement in the Organisation

As a manager, you have the responsibility to provide opportunities for employees to use their strengths. By placing employees in roles where they can be at their best every day, you can empower them to get even better at their strengths. When your workers are more engaged, it leads to higher productivity.

According to Gallup, managers who encourage their employees to use their talents are six times more likely to foster engagement. Moreover, 61% of employees whose managers adopt a strength-based approach in the workplace are engaged. This is double the average number of workers who are engaged in the entire United States (30%).

5. Building Strengths is Faster and Easier than Improving Weaknesses

Building strengths is straightforward and faster than trying to fix weaknesses. There will be less friction because your employees are more likely to get on board, and it requires less time and effort because they are already good at what they do; you’re only making them better.

On the other hand, your workers will be more reluctant to make significant changes, especially if the change swims against the tide of their natural talents. Therefore, that approach can be a long and hard journey that ends up being frustrating and unrewarding.

6. People Stay in Companies Longer When the Focus is on Strengths

A strengths-based approach makes people feel valued. As a result, they will be more engaged, productive, and less likely to leave the organization. However, if you choose to focus on fixing weaknesses, your people will be less satisfied and productive and will have a higher chance of leaving the company for another job that puts their talents to better use.

“If you focus on people’s weaknesses, they lose confidence.”

Conclusion

The importance of a strength-based approach in the workplace cannot be overstated. As a leader or manager, you should take the steps required to create a culture that focuses on developing strengths rather than eliminating flaws.

Begin by identifying the strengths of your employees, and help them align their talents to what their roles demand.

All employees have areas of strengths (and weaknesses). You should always seek to develop these strengths by assigning roles based on abilities, incorporating strengths in performance evaluations and career conversations, and encouraging workers to set goals based on what they excel at. Focusing on strengths creates good opportunities for success for both the employee and the organization’s bottom line.

Jan 27, 2021
8 Reasons We Should Know Our Values, Worth, and Purpose
A lot of my coaching work involves working with people to figure out what their deepest held values are, and what they consider important in life. It is often surprising that many people have no idea what their values are. And that included me too for a long long time. If I introspect, I realize that I had never thought of my values before I started being coached back in 2010.

I often wonder why we don’t know our values as adult human beings? Why don’t we know what is important to us and what we care for? Why don’t we know our worth? It seems to be an important question, yet most of us face this question by accident, and not by design.

It is difficult to understand why our current education system doesn’t place a lot of emphasis on character formation. I am not talking about someone telling you about right and wrong. What I mean by character formation is encouraging people to think for themselves and make their own decisions about what they care about or not?

Shouldn’t this be at the center of our formal education? We teach all about different subjects to children but fail to teach them how to discover their values and how to be the kind of person they want to be? Unless people don’t know what they care for, how will they know their worth and standing in life?

I sometimes wonder what is the job of the school or the teacher? Is it to drill a specific lesson into the pupil’s heads or to prepare them for life with values, lessons, and tools that they can use in good and bad times alike? Who will teach our kids about resilience, empathy, care, and collaboration instead of only knowledge, chasing success, competition, and ambition?

This kind of teaching is severely missing from our educational system. How is one supposed to act in our dynamic and chaotic world if we don’t even know our values? Unfortunately, the problem goes beyond our schools or the education system. We seem to live in a culture that has forgotten the importance of having values. However, this wasn’t always the case.

“Knowing others is intelligence;
knowing yourself is true wisdom.
Mastering others is strength;
mastering yourself is true power.”
LAO TZU, Tao Te Ching

Why Do We Glorify Achievement Over Values?

In his book, The Road to Character, David Brooks argues that society took a turn for the worse somewhere in the mid-20th century when the focus shifted to individualism and self-desire. As a result, modern society seems to have lost touch with our values. Our culture now glorifies achievement at the expense of character development, and parents are not spared either. Instead of imparting values to their children, they focus on report cards and career progression as they seek glory in their children’s success.

Teens today think it’s more important to have money. Out of all the teenagers surveyed from 2005 to 2007, 62% thought it was important to have lots of money in life. Compare this to just 44% between 1976 and 1978. During the 1970s, close to 49% of teenagers expected to earn more money than their folks. This number rose to 60% by the 2000s.

But as the desire for wealth increases, teenagers rarely demonstrate a great work ethic. During the late 1970s, a quarter of the teenagers surveyed admitted they were not willing to work hard for results. A few decades later, this figure had jumped to 39%.

Focus on Eulogy Virtues Instead of Resume Virtues

Resume virtues are those qualities that make us seem competent at our jobs. On the other hand, eulogy virtues are values we would want people to associate us with after we are gone. If you want to live a meaningful and satisfying life, stop thinking too much about yourself, your skills, and your possessions. Instead of focusing on the never-ending climb of achievement, focus on the inner struggles that challenge you to fight your own daemons, and grow the courage to go after what really makes you alive.

The very belief that we can control life is the biggest lie that we tell ourselves. Life, by its very nature, is messy and unpredictable. Good and bad things will happen to you. Your education, job, the country you live in, or any other reason which gives you the illusion of safety, is a very bad armor against life.

Embrace the uncertainty of life and experience real FREEDOM. Go out and play. Learn a new language. Take a new job, or live in different cities/countries and soak in different cultures. Write, paint, or do anything else that makes you experience life rather than draining the life out of you.

Don’t try to be nice or do what is expected. Don’t live for the gallery. Be authentic. For a change, LIVE for YOURSELF. And you can’t do that unless you know what your values are, what is important or not important, and what you stand for? In short, unless you know your own worth?

“Those who have a ‘why’ to live, can bear with almost any ‘how’.”

― Viktor E. Frankl

Accept Your Flaws

We must not kid ourselves. Perfection is an illusion. As human beings, we are innately flawed. However, we should always strive to be better. Our imperfections are not something to be fixed. Instead, our imperfections (strengths and weaknesses) make us the unique human being that we are. We are perfect in our imperfections.

Pride and overconfidence trick you into thinking you are better than who you are. When dealing with your own imperfection, you need to be humble. For instance, you must accept you can’t know it all and that you may never know some things. Perfect knowledge is unachievable. However, you can leverage the experience you gain and your unique strengths, skills, and values to go after what you really care about.

Find a Purpose

It is not possible to have a fulfilling life unless you take care of what you care about. Stop searching for happiness since it is not something you should crave for as a means to its own end. Instead, live an intentional life. Joy and satisfaction is a byproduct of going after what is really important to you – irrespective of whether you succeed or fail at your efforts. When you go after your calling, it gives your life meaning, and joy and aliveness will naturally follow.

I like this definition of success by John Wooden the most, “Success is peace of mind that is the direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.” Knowing what your values are and what is important to you is more important than what you choose to do.

When you connect to the things that matter most, you experience true joy. Otherwise, you may end up doubting yourself and questioning why you are doing what you are doing, even when you achieve success by society’s standards.

Research was conducted among Stanford University students who were heading home for the winter break. They were each asked to keep a daily journal. Some of them were asked to write down their most important values and how they were connected to the events of the day. Others were asked to write down the positive events that occurred throughout the day.

The results were startling. Those students who jotted down their personal values were healthier, fell sick less often, and had more energy and a better attitude than the students who wrote down the positive events in their life. These findings have been replicated in subsequent studies. In his book, The Upside of Stress, Stanford professor Kelly McGonigal argues that writing about our values has short term and long term benefits for our health, mental attitude, and social life.

Importance of Knowing Your Values

Self-awareness begins with knowing what makes you tick, and what is most important to you. The following are some benefits to be gained from knowing your worth – your values and what you stand for.
1. It Breeds Maturity
Knowing your values may not lead to fame or fortune, but it will foster maturity and help you stay grounded. When you become mature, you focus on becoming better than your own previous self rather than comparing yourself to others. You move from fragmentation to centeredness. As a consequence, the restlessness disappears, and the confusion about the meaning and purpose of life dies down.
1. They Help You Find Your Purpose
Do you know your purpose in life? As it turns out, this is not the case for most of us. It is only after identifying your values that you can begin to understand this purpose. You won’t know what you want out of life if you don’t figure out what is important to you. The first step is always to ask yourself this question – What do you care about? And the second question which can take you to your purpose is – How can you take care of what you care about?
1. They Regulate Behavior
Values are principles that guide and regulate our behaviour without it oscillating between extremes. When you’re faced with a difficult situation, it is natural to react impulsively. You can use your values to determine your actions in moments of crisis. Your values can serve as a moral lighthouse in those tough times. Self-awareness will ensure you behave in a manner that matches what you aspire to be at your core.

“Human knowledge and skills alone cannot lead humanity to a happy and dignified life. Humanity has every reason to place the proclaimers of high moral standards and values above the discoverers of objective truth.” – Albert Einstein
1. They are Valuable in Decision Making
Emotions and struggles tend to cloud our judgment if we are not aware of what we stand for. When faced with important life decisions, it would be important to stop and consider how someone who shares your values would approach the situation? As a result, you are more likely to make clear-headed decisions rather than emotionally charged ones.
1. They Help You Identify What is Important
We are constantly distracted by so many things these days. In our consumerism-driven society, we are bombarded with advertisements, notifications, and information constantly.

Identifying your values will help you clear out the clutter. It will help you clear the mud from the water allowing you to see clearly. You can then focus your time and energy on what matters and brings value, satisfaction, and aliveness into your life.
1. They Help You Choose the Right Career
With so many options available, it can be hard to figure out what you want to pursue in life. However, choosing a career path is easy when you know what matters to you most. Perhaps you value interactions and forging meaningful relationships more than endlessly chasing after results. Perhaps you value just the opposite. Knowing what you stand for, and what matters to you, will help you consciously take your life and career forward, rather than just drifting with the flow.
1. They Help You Develop a Sense of Self
Knowing your values and worth shapes your beliefs. It enables you to develop strong opinions about key subjects. You can’t just believe what your parents or friends believe and want you to believe. You have to figure out what you truly stand for so you can be your authentic self around others. In both good times and bad, your values can serve as a moral compass always guiding you to your north star.
1. They Impact Your Overall Happiness
At the end of the day, knowing your values brings joy into your life. When you take action aligned with your values and to take care of what you care about, the result will be a more meaningful and happier life. When you are able to do so, you will find aliveness, joy, and satisfaction even if you have to face some tough challenges on the way.

Conclusion

As adults, we must dig deeper, introspect, and ask ourselves the tough questions to know our values. Identifying what is important to you will enable you to live a more meaningful life. You will be able to find your purpose, make the right decisions, navigate through tough situations, and choose the right career path.

Ultimately, values will help you develop a sense of self, shape your character, improve your confidence, and increase your overall happiness. When you know your worth, you know where you stand and where to draw a line.
Jan 22, 2021
Issue #18, 19 Jan 2021 – You Are More Powerful Than You Think You Are

Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter. Every two weeks I share what impactful leadership looks like to show you how powerful you are. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

I always thought I was shy, introverted, and only good for working with computers. Then 2011 happened when I organized an anti-corruption protest march in India. 400 people showed up that day – still one of my proudest moments. In the next year, I set up a not for profit organization with volunteer-driven teams in 5 Indian cities. I had no idea I was capable of producing the results that I produced. That led me on a journey to understand human behavior, potential, and leadership.

What I have found is that all of us operate at a level much below our true potential. We end up believing we are wired a certain way (by our family, peers, society) which limits our possibilities and actions. With the right support, you can often surprise yourself and those around you with what you can do.

You are more powerful than you realise. You are braver than you think. You can life of complete aliveness and joy. You can watch life from the stands, or you can get on the arena and play like a champion. And if you are in the arena, you have already won. What is it that is on hold in your life? What is that idea or project which has been waiting for you to show up? Maybe, now is the time for you to make that happen. Maybe, now is the time to see what you are capable of. Maybe, now is the time to take care of what you truly care about.

Reply to this email right now if it sparked something, or if you want to take the conversation ahead?

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

How Labels Shape Our Reality and Limit Our Ability to Reason

Sometimes, we voluntarily label ourselves, and sometimes society labels us. When we do it, labeling can act as a compass to our values. When someone else does it, a label can be a lifelong prison sentence.

Labels can lead to tribalism, dogma, and mob mentality. When we crave connection, we join groups in order to feel a sense of belonging. But it becomes dangerous when that group limits what you can and cannot say to the point where you forfeit independent and rational thought.

We label people as fixed characters — ones incapable of change. So we label — sometimes entire swaths of people — as “addicts,” “racists,” “socialists,” and “criminals.”

Remember, every time you slap a label on someone and put them in a box, you filter what you see. You make your world smaller, simpler, and less reflective of reality. As novelist Toni Morrison once wrote, “The definitions belong to the definers, not the defined.“

From How Labels Shape Our Reality and Limit Our Ability to Reason

Two

An Offer To Join Me In A Year Long Leadership Journey

Starting next month, I am starting a one-year leadership program with the Institute of Generative Leadership to improve my leadership skills. I will directly apply what I learn in the program to set up my own leadership development and coaching company in Amsterdam this year. One thing to realize as a leader is that learning never stops, and it is never too late to approach learning with a beginner’s attitude.

If you want to take your leadership skills to the next level and see for yourself how powerful you can be, I invite you to join me in this year-long journey. You will be amazed by the kind of results you can produce given the right support and coaching.

If you are interested to see what you are capable of, just hit reply and we can have a conversation about how the program works.

That’s it for now. If you have any questions, just hit reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect

Jan 19, 2021
5 Steps To Deploy Yourself And Live An Authentic Life

A lot of us, especially in our youthful days, struggle with how to deploy ourselves in the world. Instead of being true to ourselves and charting our own unique course, we tend to follow paths that others have decided on our behalf. However, if we take the long-term view, taking the path less traveled and Deploying Ourselves can make all the difference in the long run.

Unfortunately, most of us prefer to stay in our comfort zones instead of striving to become the best version of ourselves. In this article, I will share 5 things that you are probably not doing but which could help you thrive and not just survive.

To get fulfillment in life, we must understand who we are and lead an authentic life – one that is based on our values, and that utilizes our strengths and talents. The following are five key things that you can do to take charge of your life and Deploy Yourself.

Do you know what makes you happy? Or sad?

1. Understand Yourself – Your Values, Emotions, Desires, Strengths, and Weaknesses

The first step towards Deploying Yourself is to understand what you care about and what is important to you. Identifying your unique set of values can be the first step towards building self-awareness. Often in life, most of us don’t know what we care about and what matters to us. As a result, we end up accepting the standards and values which other people (parents, society, culture, etc) decide for us. However, trying to live your life by others’ standards is akin to surrendering your own will and judgment.

On the other hand, understanding your own values and being bold enough to follow them enables your unique light to shine upon the world. Looking back at history, it is clear that people who succeed in business or career are those who choose the path less trodden and follow their own path. Steve Jobs, Apple’s former CEO and co-founder is one example. His unique ideas went against the grain, and this transformed the tech world.

A big part of understanding yourself also means becoming aware of your emotions and desires. What makes you angry, happy, or sad? What gives meaning to your days and weeks? What do you crave? If you wish to master yourself, you must learn to pay attention to what your emotions and desires are trying to tell you.

Learning about your strengths and weaknesses enables you to choose a path that aligns with your talents and abilities. Research has proven that we can do much more productive and produce better results when we try to build upon our strengths rather than improve or fix our weaknesses.

“There is no passion to be found playing small — in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” – Nelson Mandela

2. Realise that You are Unique and Special, Just Like Everyone Else

No two human beings are like. Each one of us has unique talents and skills that enable us to succeed in our careers and life. All of us have activities that fill us up with joy and satisfaction, whenever we are doing them. Unfortunately, most of us are not comfortable in our own skin, especially when our uniqueness takes us against the norms of society or of our peers. People too often hate that they are different from everybody else and try too hard to become someone they are not.

Failing to embrace your true self could stem from a desire to fit in with the crowd. What you should understand is that no two people are the same, just like no two flowers or no two birds are the same. Everyone has their own journey. And frankly, the world would be such a boring place if everybody was the same.

Instead of worrying about what others think, be ok with the fact that no matter what you do, someone somewhere will still find fault in you. If you are always comparing yourself to others and are trying to please everybody, you are allowing yourself to be deployed by others. Having a few people in your life who love you for who you are is better than having many friends who love you for who you pretend to be.

Martha Graham said, “There is a vitality, a life force, energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost.”

Why are you trying so hard to fit in when you were made to stand out?

3. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone, Live on the Edge That’s Where the Real “You” Lies

If you want to become the best version of yourself, you must be willing to get out of your comfort zone. That means pushing yourself to the edge and not being afraid to take risks. Often what stops us from learning new things are the mental limitations we put on ourselves because of fear of going beyond the comfort zone. Being afraid shrinks our vision and cripples our abilities to try out new possibilities, take new actions, and explore new learning pathways.

The best thing to do is acknowledge the presence of fear – for it is trying to tell you that the path you are moving towards is meaningful for you. Often the things you are most afraid of have the biggest potential to transform your life. So, instead of cowering when confronted by your fears, move towards them and stay at the edge of learning and new possibilities.

Remember what Bruce Lee once said, ” Courage is not the absence of fear. It is the ability to act in the presence of fear.”

Accept that fear is a natural and essential factor for growth to happen. Whenever you summon the confidence to step out of your comfort zone and face your fears head-on, subsequent stumbling blocks will look like stepping stones. Progress becomes faster and obstacles become easier because of the momentum you gain progressively. That is what Jim Collins describes as the Flywheel effect.

If you are given the task of rotating a heavy flywheel mounted on an axle, making the first turn takes a lot of time and effort. But after each successive turn, the wheel will start to pick up speed and momentum. Soon, the wheel’s weight will start working in your favor. Progressively, the effort you put in will be compounded as the wheel turns faster and faster.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson

4. Lead Yourself – Take Control of Your Desires, Emotions, Body and not Be a Slave to Them

Our emotions can impede our ability to think and act rationally if we allow ourselves to be overwhelmed by them. Most of us have, at some point, let our feelings cloud our judgment and ended up doing something that we regretted almost immediately. Emotions tell us what we care about, but reacting to them impulsively only boosts our ego by giving us instant gratification. This type of behavior feels good in the short term but is detrimental in the long term.

The good news is that emotions can be beneficial if you learn how to use them instead of trying to suppress them. Suppressing emotions only results in explosions later on and the emotion continues to keep building up inside. Instead of bottling up your emotions, pay attention to how you feel in your body and what your emotions are trying to tell you.

For instance – I once got angry when I got passed up for promotion. An impulsive reaction to that might be letting my frustration, but when I listened, my emotions were telling me that I cared for hard-work and fairness. When you understand your emotions and the motivation behind them, you can embrace them without letting them take the wheel.

Sometimes your emotions can hold you captive and control your life. They can dictate your actions and prevent you from Deploying Yourself. As Aristotle noted, “I count him braver who overcomes his desires than him who conquers his enemies; for the hardest victory is over self.”

Desire is insatiable. Once you feed it, it only expands. It disappears temporarily only to come back stronger. Therefore, you cannot overcome them by simply resisting. The key to Deploying Yourself lies in acknowledging your short-term desires and long-term cares and then taking action to take care of your cares.

For example, do you feed your desire as a way to mask something deeper and much more valuable? Addressing those important issues could help get to the root of the problem, even though that process is usually not very comfortable. If you understand your urges and what fuels them, you will be able to Deploy Yourself instead of being deployed by them.

If you don’t know what you stand for, how will you decide which path to take?

5. Stand Up and Speak Up for Yourself and Your Values

In life, we come across situations that call on us to take a stand for ourselves and what we believe in. Unfortunately, most of the time we struggle with growing a backbone and standing our ground. Any reasonable person wants to avoid conflict whenever possible. That’s understandable. However, being too accommodating can make you a pushover and prevent you from Deploying Yourself.

Never leave things unsaid if it is your true self-expression. Irrespective of the circumstances and what happens to you, you always have a choice to express yourself fully in a way that makes you proud. When you express yourself aligned with your values, you will feel good in your body. You will feel aliveness and meaning, even if others’ don’t agree. Sometimes it can be saying something as simple as “No.” Other times, it might mean writing a letter to give ourselves space to express our views authentically.

Overcome the fear that is holding you back from Deploying Yourself in life. Give it time as you build this new muscle with practice. It won’t happen overnight. But once you start putting your point across without being overly defensive or accommodating, people will be more willing to hear from you. You can start by taking small steps and starting slow. For example, you can tell the person who cuts the line to move back to the start of the line, firmly but politely.

Standing up for yourself doesn’t mean being aggressive. It is having the courage to stand in the authenticity of your opinion and believing in your self-worth. So, when the situation demands it, stand up and speak up for what you believe. You will find yourself becoming more comfortable in your own skin with time as you build the muscle of Deploying Yourself.

Final Thoughts

Take some time to pause and think about what do you really care about. Don’t shy away from asking yourself the hard questions. If you only follow what everyone is doing, you can easily get lost in the crowd. But once you identify your unique set of values, cares, and strengths, and understand your emotions and desires, it can guide you into understanding and deploying yourself.

History is awash with examples of great individuals and leaders who dared to dream. Their unique ideas managed to change the course of their life while also making a significant impact in their respective fields. If you do the five essential things listed above, you will gain the confidence and assurance needed to chart your unique path instead of following the crowd.

Jan 14, 2021
The 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing by Al Reis and Jack Trout

Contrary to prior belief about marketing being all about the USP of the product or service, marketing is all about how the customer perceives the product and the brand. In a bid to increase sales, they center their marketing strategies on upgrading a product when actually; they need to tweak people’s perceptions.

The 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing (1994) by marketing gurus Al Reis and Jack Trout, shows us power-packed marketing strategies that can help organizations avoid redundant marketing mistakes, stay on top of the competition, create a steadfast brand and most importantly change people’s perceptions. It lists down 13 laws of marketing that companies should follow for branding success.

1. Law Of Leadership

For any product to be a leader in the market, it has to be in the top position in its category. The rule surrounding the Law of Leadership is that it has to the first of its kind in the market.

For example, if we look at LinkedIn, it was the first of its kind that took a different spin on social networking. Rather than create a brand that focused on networking with friends, it chose professional networking. They are now the top brand in their category.

2. Law Of Mind

Some products might not be the first in the market. However, every brand should aim at being the first in the customer’s mind. Often, the product or brand that leads the market is the one that pops into a customer’s mind whenever they think of the product category.

This means that the first impression is the most important. This is the reason why sometimes brand names become synonymous with the products. For example, every time a person says Xerox, they are actually referring to photocopying.

Other factors that influence the Law of Mind is the name of the product. The name of a product should be short and catchy. For example, which product would one consider, MITS Altair 8800, or Apple?

The 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing by Al Reis and Jack Trout

3. Law Of Category

It isn’t always possible to be the first product of its kind in the market, or, there could be an existing market leader already. Then, one can turn to create a new product category in the market altogether. Creating a new product category altogether gives a headstart in making the product a market leader. This means one doesn’t have to worry about competition in the market, at least for some time.

Charles Schwab, in 1971 ventured into the brokerage market when there were many players ruling the roost already. He, however, turned things around by creating a new category – the discount brokerage. His client base multiplied in a short span, making his product the market leader.

4. Law of Opposites

The Law of Opposites works wonders for companies that are stuck in the second position to the market leaders. The law states, that comparing a product with the market leader, while downplaying or showing the market leader’s strengths as their weaknesses, can attempt to knock down the market leader from its position.

For example, Pepsi focussed on appealing to different, young, and hip generation of customers, by portraying Coca-Cola as one that was preferred by the oldies.

They cleverly appealed to another customer base altogether who wouldn’t want to be cast in the same mold as their parents and grandparents.

5. The Law Of Focus

Companies, along with factories, machines, and logos, can also ‘own’ their own word. It means that if a customer thinks of a word, he associates the word with a brand name. In the U.S., for example, people associate the word ‘ketchup’ with Heinz. This is due to the fact that Heinz has made their brand name powerful enough that people automatically associate Ketchup with Heinz.

The essence of the law lies in using one catchy, sticky way for customers to associate with. When a brand owns a word, it’s securing a place in the consumer’s mind. For example, Volvo is virtually synonymous with ‘safety’.

6. Law Of Exclusivity

Entrepreneurs need to keep in mind that not all words are always up for grabs. The Law of Exclusivity means that companies should steer clear of words used by other companies.

While it makes no obvious sense to use another company’s ‘owned’ word, doing so can not only entangle companies into legal battles and cost them trips to the courts, but also make customers think of the company as an imposter. The attempt of Energizer to steal the perception of ‘long-lasting’ from Duracell with their pink, plush and funny Energizer Bunny Ads, they could not change their customer’s minds who associated ‘long-lasting’ with Duracell already.

7. The Law Of Sacrifice

In marketing, less is always more. While customers love choice, a decision to expand a company’s product line could prove to be detrimental, because then, the company has to divide their focus on all products in the line and the time to create one truly successful product reduces considerably.

The Law of Sacrifice states that in marketing, one has to give something up because specializing in a few products helps in creating a stronger market profile. For example, the most successful companies in retail are the ones that focus on a specialty, like The Gap that sells casual clothes, and Foot Locker who specializes in athletic sport’s shoes. Retail department stores that specialize in selling everything are suffering in comparison.

The law also states that companies should focus on one target market. In our earlier Pepsi example, we say how Pepsi changed the focus of its strategy and targetted young customers. Later on, however, when they switched their target base to everyone, they failed, because Coca-Cola was already leading the ‘generalist’ market.

8. Law Of Division

Sometimes companies decide to split and divide product lines for growth. In such cases, remembering the Law of Division can help maintain market dominance. The law states that eventually, every product category breaks into several different ones. In such times, how do a product and brand profile stay durable?

The answer lies in giving each new product category its own distinct brand name. Consumers like choice and like to buy products and services from different brands. For example, General Motors, while diversifying its automobile lines, created several new brands that focussed on different customer categories with brands such as Cadillac, Pontiac, Chevrolet, and Oldsmobile, thus maintaining its position of the market leader in each new category.

9. The Law Of Success

Arrogance due to success is true to companies, products, and brands as well. Moreover, overindulging arrogance can spell doom for the most successful companies too. The Law of Success warns that arrogance can make a company blind, and can lead to making – and not making – decisions that can weaken a brand.

At times a company can become overconfident that their successful brand name can sell anything, leading to haphazard product line expansions. Similarly, leaders can tend to shoot down creative path-breaking ideas due to their overconfidence.

In the mid-1970s, the founder of Digital Equipment Corporation (DEC), Ken Olsen, got an opportunity to focus on a new product category – the personal computer. Unconvinced, and overly confident of his own market position, he refused the opportunity, leading to the decline of the company in the evolving personal computers market.

10. The Law Of Unpredictability

Mid or long-term predictions in marketing strategy are rarely effective. Therefore companies should avoid making costly marketing decisions on market predictions. Similarly, no company can predict the moves of their competitors in the future.

The future is unknown and markets are highly dynamic, volatile entities that can swing in any direction. With prediction, companies stand the risk to extrapolate and jump to conclusions, severely affecting their brand and product in turn.

11. The Law Of Failure

The Law of Failure is a tough one to accept but one that companies have to deal with. The law warns that mistakes are inevitable. Most successful companies continue to pretend that they don’t make mistakes. This leads to making decisions such as the refusal to drop a bad project that can be detrimental.

Even managers in any organization who hate to make mistakes avoid taking risks. Risk is a natural and essential element in the world of business, and trying to avoid it means potentially losing out on a great opportunity.

12. Law Of Hype

The Law of Hype states that too much publicity can be misleading. However, letting publicity and hype affect marketing decisions in haste is foolhardy. Just because there is a lot of hype about a competitor’s product in the market, does not mean that it’s on its way to becoming a marketing leader. Marketing strategists should keep in mind that a company holding many press conferences could be simply attempting to reverse their downward-spiraling sales. They should remember that performing products do not need marketing hype.

For example, in 1948, there was a lot of hype in the media surrounding the launch of Tucker 48. It was said to be the first of a new generation of automobiles. However, the company managed to sell only 51 cars!

13. The Law Of Candor

Media hype, especially about competitor attacks on one’s product can give nightmares, yet the Law of Candor can guide a pained company into a semblance of comfort. Therefore if ever a competitor catches a mistake, it’s best to simply accept and admit it. It’s true that when a company admits its negative, it is often rewarded with a positive.

Admitting a mistake often helps customers perceive the product and the brand as trustworthy, whereas denying it could question the company’s credibility. For example, Listerine was challenged by a competitor Scope in their ads that their mouthwash tasted bad. While they knew that they couldn’t dent the fact, they turned the taunt around with a slogan that said “The taste you hate twice a day.” This made customers perceive the bad taste as medicinal, and therefore a better product.

Summary

Companies that invest in understanding and applying these laws of marketing often craft out better strategies than simply adding more money into the marketing mix. It is essential to remember – successful marketing strategies focus on perceptions, not products.

Jan 11, 2021
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (1996) by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish

As parents, we all have endured that tantrum bang in the middle of public space. Most often, we have snapped at children, ignored them, and at times, even yelled, resorting to threats and punishments for bad behavior. Or we have seen another child at the mall screaming and yelling, lying on the floor, throwing a tantrum, and leaving the parents in charge absolutely helpless not knowing how to control their child. Haven’t we all often thought, “Thank God that is not my kid!”

What if there is a better way to manage children – rugrats and teens alike, without seeming like the enemy. How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (1996) by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish is a clear and practical guide for parents to establish successful and improved communication with their children. They discuss real-life scenarios and offer tactics for coping with such situations, as well as beneficially turning the situation around.

After all, all parents wish for harmonious communication with their children.

Acknowledging A Child’s Feelings

Scenario: A five year old suddenly throws a tantrum in the super market, shrieking, “I want food now! Im hungry!”

While many parents would scold, snap, or even shout back, would such a reaction really get the child to calm down and see reason?

In such a scenario, the child will not listen to the parent because his tantrum is a result of his hunger. A scolding parent will be unable to acknowledge how the child is feeling at that moment. Children behave according to how they feel, and most parents are unable to address this issue when they communicate with the child at that time. Snapping or shouting back ignores how the child actually feels and the child cannot understand why he should listen when he is feeling hungry.

The best way and the only way to pacify a child is to address his feelings and show the child that the parent is listening. The parent could say, “I understand that you’re hungry and it’s been long since breakfast.” Or the parent could step into fantasy and say, “I wish I could wave my wand and get a burger here.”

This will help in changing the child’s mood for that moment, calming him down enough to see reason.

Key Communication Skills For Parents

A child never listens to an angry parent. Instead, the child reciprocates to the parent with anger, yells, and ignores the parent, continuing to do whatever the parent is telling him/her not to do. Anger at a child often gets the better of parents. How should a parent get out of such a situation?

Parents can use a few communication skills that can help create an atmosphere of understanding and respect. Establishing proper communication is vital to changing a child’s difficult behavior.

Scenario: A child is throwing a temper tantrum to stay up beyond bedtime.

Rather than being dismissive, parents can say, “If you don’t sleep on time, you’ll be tired all day tomorrow.” Provide some information to support the sentence like, “If you’re tired, you won’t be able to concentrate.”

Providing explanations gives children the ability to think for themselves and make the decision themselves. Additionally, using this tactic regularly will create a habit, where the child will be able to make rational decisions and listen to parents.

Compromise Is Better Than Punishment

Getting through to a rebellious child can feel like banging one’s head to the wall. When things get out of hand repeatedly, parents resort to punishment.

Punishment, however, leads to further anger, hinders future progress, and makes a child harbour bitter feeling towards parents. This can push the child further away from heeding the parent’s advice and the child will never understand why what they did was wrong.

Scenario: A teen comes home late past curfew time repeatedly during school week.

The classic reaction parents have to this scenario is to ground the child. However, stopping the child from going out will make the child feel angrier and misunderstood, will be unable to understand why staying out late is bad, and will only be able to see that the parents don’t approve of the child going out.

In such a scenario, parents should address the child’s feelings. First, ask why the child comes late. Additionally, parents can express their own concern and care for the child, by telling the child that they were worried about the child’s safety.

The parent can come to a mutual understanding and agreement, like sending the parent a text if they are getting late, with the child and try it out rather than resorting to punishment.

Independence To Discover

Parents often find it difficult to let their children ‘fly out of the nest’. Parents squirm with the idea that their children will eventually make their own choices as adults, will fail, and get back on their feet. It’s watching a child struggle that makes parents melt into making it easy for their children.

Scenario: A child struggles to tie his or her own shoelace.

Many parents simply do everything for their children, making them continually dependent. Helicoptering a child can make the child over-dependent and make it incapable of doing anything on their own, or can even work in the reverse direction, where the child starts feeling frustrated at being unable to do things on their own, leading to stubbornness and hostility.

Parents should encourage a child’s autonomy. Let the child make some decisions on his own. For example, parents can give a child the autonomy of deciding when to complete their homework, as long as it’s within the deadline.

Additionally, parents should encourage their children to seek help from friends and other adults such as teachers, grandparents, etc. Parents should also let their children explore and let them test the waters themselves. They will fail and struggle, but a parent swooping in to help will never teach the child the value of struggling and the child will never understand what it feels to succeed, even if they do.

The Double-Edged Swords Of Praise And Labelling

Praising a child is easy, isn’t it? However, it is much more complicated than we think because sometimes, well-intentioned praise can evoke feelings of anxiety or even denial. Therefore parents need to be careful and praising should be done in a helpful way.

For example, rather than saying, “what a lovely poem,” one can say, “your poem is really moving. How creative of you.”

Additionally, parents should avoid praise that talks of the child’s past weakness. Saying, “ This poem is better than the last one. That one was bad.” This will instead make the child feel demotivated simply because of the negative comments about the child’s earlier writing skills.

Parents should absolutely avoid labelling children as stubborn, lazy, slow, snobbish, or bossy. Labelling makes a child retain that habit and they can take the label into adulthood as well. One should always steer clear of labelling.

Conclusion

Establishing good parent to child communication is all about acknowledging a child’s feelings, providing explanations for the rules they set, giving them the independence to ask questions, and test the waters themselves.

Listening to what the child has to say before making judgments and passing down punishments will help in fostering better communication with the child and respecting the child’s feelings will help the child respect the parents more and see reason.

Jan 7, 2021
Issue #17, 5 Jan 2021 – How To Powerfully Step Into 2021?
Welcome to the Deploy Yourself Newsletter. Every two weeks I share about what impactful leadership looks like to show you how powerful you are. I also share the most insightful lessons and stories I encountered in the last two weeks. You can also read this issue online.

Hey,

Today, as we stand at the cusp of a new year, is our annual reminder that time has come to move on from 2020 and prepare ourselves for the changes coming. Here are a few things I do each year to step into the new year on my own terms :-

1. Complete The Previous Year (2020)
Introspect your goals (if any) at the start of the year and make peace with where you are now.
Celebrate your achievements (big and small) and laugh about your failures (missed opportunities)
Reflect upon what you have learned, and how you have changed or grown over the year.
Free your mind from the grip of the difficult people and hard situations you have encountered this year.
Apologize if you realize you have been a difficult person in someone else’s life.
Give up any blame, regret or shame gathered this year. There will be new to collect in 2021
Thank and express gratitude to everyone who has made a difference in your life
2. Know Yourself
1. What are your deepest motivations? What have you always wanted to do?
2. What are you really passionate about? Is there something worth devoting your life to?
3. What drives your actions and decisions? What are the values you hold most dearly?
4. What makes you really happy or angry?
5. Who are your biggest inspirations in life, and who are the people you can’t stand? Why?
3. Where do you want to be in the next 5 or 10 years?

This might seem too far ahead in the future, but it doesn’t take long for these years to roll by. Just think about how quickly the last 10 years have passed by.

Imagining your own future can feel a bit strange and uncomfortable at first, but soon it will become a lot of fun – just like a game. Do not let this question overwhelm you (which it can), and instead, play it like a game and see what you come up with.

4. Decide milestones or checkpoints on the way

Make sure to be clear about what you want to achieve, when and where you will achieve that and with whom. The more numbers you can use the better this step will be in its fruitfulness, and it is best to avoid vague words like soon, sometime, in a few weeks, improvement, better, more, etc.

With the above four steps, you can step into the new year and make a powerful “start“. Knowing where you want to go is always better than hoping to get “somewhere” by default.

Reply to this email right now if it sparked something, or if you want to take the conversation ahead?

Articles and Stories Which Have Fascinated Me

One

7 Essential Work Skills For The 2020s And 2030s

Our world is changing fast, with new technologies and ways of doing business. So much has changed since 2000 – and the next 20 years will be no different. The coronavirus pandemic has already accelerated this change. People will need to adapt to this constantly changing landscape to stay relevant and perform well.

Below are 7 workplace skills everyone will need in in the future – the 2020s and beyond that.

1. Multi-Disciplinary Thinking

2. Emotional Intelligence

3. Creative, Out-of-the-Box Thinking

4. Logical and Data-Driven Reasoning

5. Virtual Collaboration

6. Designing a Holistic Environment That Promotes Wellbeing

7. Having a Voice

From 7 Essential Work Skills For The Future – An Article From My Desk

Two

Write a Resume that Tells Your Story

A great resume tells your career story. It will take you where you want to go, not just say where you’ve been.

If you take a storytelling approach to reflecting on your experience before you craft a document, you will unlock a more interesting and comprehensive version of your experience.

Your career, like a plot, is made up of a series of events. You’ll start to see how the story comes together once you consider the relationship between the events, the characters who helped shape them, and the setting that influenced why things transpired the way they did.

Simply saying you have a growth mindset or are a life-long learner is not enough! Take the opportunity to show with a story what you have to offer rather than just telling them.

From Write a Resume that Tells Your Story

That’s it for now. If you have any questions, just hit reply. All the best,

Sumit

(Twitter) @SumitGupta
(LinkedIn) Connect
Jan 5, 2021